Barny the purple dinosaur has no imagination, stuck his finger up his ass and called it masterbaition!

What's black and blue and made of poo? A drowning black guy, holding some blue poop

How do you treat lice Avoid getting them

Oracle horacle, you big bloated boracle!

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall Humpty Dumpty is an egg so nobody cares

"New season of Dr.Phil. How does that make you feel?" ANGERY!!!!!

A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

Would you spit or swallow? Well, in circumstances when i am eating or drinking, i would swallow. Although if i had something disgusting in my mouth i would spit

Hey, is that your corvette. No I thought it was yours.

What is green and fuzzy and can kill you when it falls out of a tree A pooltable

Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

Q: Why did the 10 year old squirt his dad with the water hose? A: What to year old WOULDN'T?

Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was tired of this joke.

Q: Why did'n the dirty man jump into the shower? A: Because he spotted the potential danger to jump into a slippery shower and proceeded with caution.

How do you beat a black in sports. "shot him when the game starts"

Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

What do you call two gay guys? People who should be living in California.

whats big, white and will kill someone if it falls out of a tree? a refridgerater

Why are apathy,ignorance, and resentment alike? I dont know and I don't care to know.

What's worse than a completely overused anti-joke punchline? The Holocaust.

Son come here OK daddy Daddy what are you doing DADDY NO! DADDY NO!

Whats orange at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby without floaties.

What do you call a flat-chested woman with a penis? A man.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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