Person: hey buddy have you heard the greteat news Freind: yea you have aids Person: no my wife jusr became a pristatue an she had ten patients already i was her first

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I used to be addicted to soap, but now I'm clean. I'm still addicted to heroin, though. No chance I'm ever giving that up.

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A man walks into a bar. Oh, wait, no. It was a horse. So... A man walks into a horse

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Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

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Why couldn't jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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A black man and a mexican man jump off the empire state building.Who wins? Nobody,suicide is a serious thing and it is depressing to think that the minorities In America would do such a thing to themselves.

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A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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Why did John get hard? He froze to death

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A blind man walks into a bar, bystanders help him up.

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What do you call a house full of Mexicans? A house

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What happened to the alcoholic man that decided to never drink ever again? He died of thirst. Moral: Alcohol was the only available liquid in this twilight zone... Anti anti joke

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what did the unicorn say to the centaur? nothing because neither exist

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Knock knock Whose there? Nobody Nobody who? ......................................

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They got in a crash and died.

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Why did the jew save his money? Because his wife has cancer and the radiation treatments are very expensive.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

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Q: How many Babies does it take to paint a garage? A: babies do not have good motor skills therefore, they can not hold a paint brush.

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jack and jill went up the hill to get a bucket of water. jack fell down and broke his ankle and neck severely. jack and jill were taken away from their parents by child services, and their parents are charged for child endangerment and child labor.

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whats orange and cant talk? an orange

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Bend Over.

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What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

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Why were the parents sad? Because their son had a frog stapled to his face and was trying to eat his ice cream on a swing, but he had no arms so he dropped his ice cream into the street and he chased after his ice cream and got hit by a bus

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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