Q; What is green and eats rocks? A; The green rock eater... Q;What happens when you through a rock straight up in the north pole? A; The green rock eater eats it..

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What do you call a girl who has recently been raped? Dead

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Why was a woman not considered in the role for a stunt driver? Because her skill level was not sufficient enough for the requirements.

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why shouldn't you get a clown angry? Because they'll yell at you.

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How many Soviet Russians does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, in Soviet Russia, light bulbs are an unavailable commodity because the tyrannical government has called for a ban on unnatural illumination. A fact which is not lost on Mikhail, the light bulb maker whose wife died because his lack of business caused him to miss payments on his hospital bills.

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Yo mama's so fat, she had a lap-band procedure.

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Why was the house on fire? A dog peed on it.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swings? Because she didn't have arms or legs. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Suzie

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I'd like to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather did. Not screaming in terror like the rest of te people in his car.

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Your mom is so old that she most likely will die soon.

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what class did Jimmy get an A in? None, he is dyslexic

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How do Asians name their children? They throw them down the stairs and see what sound they make.

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Whats the difference between an aboriginal and a deer? Nothing, infact they are quite similar, they have no house and smell like wild animals and jaywalk.

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You're so ugly, when yo' mama dropped you off at school, she kissed your forehead and called you beautiful.

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What did the nazi say to the jew? Nothing, he shot 'em

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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A man walks into a bar and orders two shots the bartender then picks up his shotgun and gives it to him

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Why couldn't Billy eat his dinner? Because a black man amputated his hands.

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Q) How many boring people does it take to screw in a light bulb? A) One

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So a man and his wife were in a horrible car accident. The man died, so why isn't the wife mourning his death? Because she is also dead. But, do you know who did mourn and cry over this horrible tragedy? Their children, other family members, and friends.

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If I am from Texas, where are you from? You know the answer? HOLY SH*T! YOU ARE A GENIUS!

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chuck norris multiplied by zero equals zero.

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why wasnt johnny in math class?....he slipped and cracked his skull on his way there, he is now recovering at the hospital

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Can Anti-Jokes censor curse-word tenses? Fuck Fucking Fucked Fucks

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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