What do you call a human with no eye? A Human.

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Why did the man die? He had a terrible form of flesh-eating bacteria and he suffered a lot of pain.

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How did the chicken perform the bank robbery? It was crossing the road and cluelessly walked into a bank, and EVERYONE in that bank had Chickenphobia so they just GAVE him the money...

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How are black people and apples the same They both hang from trees

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A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car, who's driving? Their father Micheal, he adopted both of them from a mentally handicapped orphanage when they were five.

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So, you got to take medications daily or die? Are you in pain my dear?

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Do you know what a zombie smells like? Death

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jews

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How do you get rid of black people in your back yard? Politely ask them to leave.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping in New York? He woke up.

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Why didn't the black kid get anything for Christmas? His family was Jewish.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a serial-rapist with links to the Black Dragon triad. Yee.

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing???? she had down syndrome

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A kid comes across an injured duck near a lake. Nevermind he doesn't see it he's really high.

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A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

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Three men are on a plane (note this is a low altitude plane) they're are going on they're 2nd grizzly bear hunting trip in Alaska. they crash into a mountain and all die. except the pilot. he left the wreckage and died from the freezing temperatures of an Alaskan winter.

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what is the difference between gravel and dead baby guts? i dont eat gravel.

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I can prove I'm a psychic - this post is going to receive a lot of dislikes.

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? Depending on the size of the car, you should be able to safely fit somewhere between 2 and 8.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well why wouldn't it?

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Brother: Where is my Guitar? Me: To the Left to The left Brother : No its not Me: Everything you own in the box to the to the left Brother : Im telling Mom Me: In the Closet Thats my stuff and if i bought please don't touch Brother: *Opens Closet* This is all Mine! Me: *Takes off headphones*? Huh? Brother: Nevermind - _ -

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Me: Wanna play a game of red light and as I get closer to you, you get to call red light?? girl: Yea! okay, go! girl: green light!! Me: Sorry, firetrucks don't stop for red lights

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how do you confuse a blonde? tap her on both shoulders

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All the kids at school we're playing soccer on a sunny day except Jenny, because she had a headache and didn't come to school that day

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops