What did the caterpillar say when he emerged from his chrysalis? I am a butterfly.

There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

Why did the blackman fall off the bike? Because he stole it.

How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

why should you not go to sleep in public? Because that's how you get raped.

Q: what's yellow and can't use chopsticks. A: corn

What is the hottest day of the week? Wednesday

Whats the difference between wayne rooney and shrek? Well, one, shrek is fictional. Two if he was fictional,he is green. Wayne rooney is not green. Three wayne rooney plays for a football team, surely shrek has no idea what football is. The list goes on.

How many apes does it take to put in a light bulb 3

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

A apple a day keeps gramar away.

Q. why did the girl fall off the swing? A. Because she had no arms.

The next sentence is true. The previous statement is false.

Q:What is your maturity on a scale of 1 to 100? A:69

Wanna hear a joke? Zeke friends Wanna hear a better jokes? Zeke with his friends

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died.

Two men were walking down the road when one of them spotted an old lamp lying in a ditch. After examining the lamp's handiwork for several seconds one man rubbed the lamp with his shirt sleeve. The men then continued down the road.

What's the difference between Micheal Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Micheal Jackson has never been on the moon, Neil Armstrong never had plastic surgery and Micheal was a pop star.

Yo mama so dirty when she takes baths there are rings.

What's 8 foot tall and can't breathe? Ryan Eisenhour

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

whats big and can vibrate after you turn it on? A washing machine.

Fine Nero, but I will be keeping an eye on you.

A man asks a young boy to get in his van. The kid, being very well-educated tells the man he cannot talk to strangers. So, the man tells the kid he understands, and drives away to another nearby child.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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