Chlamydia

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Knock knock Whos there? Knock knock Who's there? Knock knock Who's there?! "is anyone home this is Helan Keller"

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THER ONCE WAS A jueny WITH A TEN FOOT WENNY AND HE WENT TO SHOW IT TO THE LADY NEXT DOOR SHE THOUGHT IT WAS A SNKE SO SHE HIT IT WITH A RAKE AND NOW ITS ONLY FIVE FOOT FOUR!

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2 black guys, a colombian guy and a white girl are sitting at a bar. They are friends.

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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What did the Macedonian guy say to the Croatian guy? Both of our countries are from the former Yugoslavia.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a swimming pool? Determined.

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Whats happening when you see your TV floating at night? You are probably suffering from some sort of mental disorder which causes spontaneous hallucinations and should seek medical help before the condition worsens.

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What is green, walks on four legs, and is capable of the strongest bite in the world? An alligator.

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What did the amputee get for Christmas? Shot.

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What's funnier than British people ? Their tea in the Harbor

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yo momma is so fat that she contributes to americas obesity problem

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

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"You just went and made a new dinosaur?" "And due to its well-developed core muscles the staff behind Jurassic World has called it - 'ABDOMINUS PEX'." "That's a stupid name."

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What's black and white and red all over? A dead Zebra

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A man walks into a bar with a frown on his face His dog just died

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What did the farmer say to little susie? I have a gun. Get in the car and dont scream or i will kill you

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender says had a bad day the man says yes... he orders 10 shots goes home and shoots his neighbors

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to

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Why was rebecca crying? Because her mum had just died in a house fire!!!

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers but at least i do not have Alzheimers

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Why aren't there Olympics in Mexico? Idk Because everyone that can run jump or swim are already across the boarder.

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What was the black kid carrying when he was running down your street? His television set

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Why didn't the cat play with the ball of yarn? It was drowned in a toilet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops