Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homosexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual pandas just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homosexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

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A devout Christian dies– Peter winks as his soul passes through the impenetrable Gates of Heaven. Everyone is gay and– like, gay as in happy– Homosexuals aren't allowed in.

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So a penguin walks into a bar. Penguin's have been affected by global warming so much that they decide to drink away as they near their final hours.

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Can yas all stfu SBBBBBBBBBSBSBSBSBSSBBSBSSBSBSBSBSBSBSBSBSBSBBBBBB

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What would Osama Bin Laden be doing if he were alive today? Drowning

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Why did the director call cut? Because he was shot dead by Nazis.

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Q. What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car. A. Get in the car.

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Repeat after me... I'matote ulbu twad Now say that all together Im a total butt wad

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Q.What happens when Torres scores A. He doesn't

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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Q. How many grains of rice can you fit in an egg? A. Fire extinguisher.

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In order to find a woman, you need time and money. Woman=Time&Money The longer you spend at work, the more money you get. Time=Money Money is the root of most problems in the world today. Money=Problems Therefore Women=Problems

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What do you call it when an old person cuts off their fingers? Dementia

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says: Why the long face? The horse says: "My wife's dead."

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cop arrests a jew and interrogates him Jew. i aint telling you nothing cop: really cop pours a bag of coins on the table jew: thats about $7.80 cop: you can have it if you tell us what we want to know jew: ok jew: i stole the money 123

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Yo' mamas so fat that your friend said a yo mama so fat joke to you. You were certainly not amused.

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What's brown and furry on the outside, soft moist and tastes good on the inside, begins with "C" and ends with "T", and has a "U" and an "N" in it? A coconut.

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Why was the little boy sad? -Because he was on Fire.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van.

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Why did the boy throw butter out the window? To test the principles of gravity.

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did Michael Jackson touch children ? yes of course. otherwise he would have been an absolutely terrible father

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A man came home from work and said to his wife im going to kill u

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Knock Knock. Who's there? grape. Grape who? Purple grape.

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Q: What did the Mexican say to the other Mexican? A: To get to the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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