So there was this kid who was sitting on a stool, and the stool started moving. He then realized that stools do not move, so he got up and ran away as quickly as he could.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the black man go to hospital? To cure his black.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why did the girl have pink hair? because she died it purple, but it didn't work.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How old is victor? Half past dead

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man and a six year old boy are walking along a path through the woods on a moonless night. "Gee mister, I'm scared!" says the boy. "You're scared?" says the man. "I have to walk back alone!"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Boy 1: What comes after L? Boy 2: Elephant, elbow, elk, elementary, Elliot, Elder Scrolls? Boy 1: No. Boy 2: What is the answer? Boy 1: M

thumb_up thumb_down +1

My Friend Philip had his lip removed today. he is just Phil now.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Two bars walk into a guy, and the bartender says, "You're telling the joke wrong, stupid!"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven is a serial rapist and has been harrassing six for months.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Excuse me sir, do you know where I can find the restroom? I don't know, I'm sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

YOU

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: Knock - Knock A: NO SOLICITORS!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What color do you wear if you're in the NAVY? Beige, white, sometimes camouflage - really, it depends on your rank and the situation.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

roses are red violets are blue i'm chinese and i don't know a joke pickle.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why is did the blonde cross the road? She was trying to catch the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Your moma so ugly she should go see a plastic surgeon.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q-Why did the little boy feel hot? A-Because he faceplanted into a bonfire.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

"My CiOCK is bigger!" "No! My CiOCK is bigger!": Two gamec.ock owners arguing over who has a bigger DiICK.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Ubisoft 'Very Impressed' By Pokemon Go, Working on AR game of their own.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Today we eat large amounts of pizza. The one piece had a lot of mushrooms. Like more than the other pieces. The cheese was flawless except for the burnt edges.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops