Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You take a survey of all citizens that live in the country of Mexico, find the wealth of each individual person, and whoever has the most money is the richest person in Mexico.

Why was the baby so hot? Napalm. Why was the baby so cold? Meat locker.

knock knock who's there Bob I don't know you Bob and if you don't get off my porch this minute i'm calling the authorities.

What do you call a orange BAD GRAMMER

Roses are Black, Violets are Black, I am Ray Charles

Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

Brain fart

Why would you kill a black man? Well, murderers have different motives, the most common of these are revenge or a psychological illness.

Knock Knock. READ THE DAMN SIGN IT SAYS NO SOLICITORS!!! ... yeah.

hwhy did the monkey fall out of the tree? he got shot. why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? he was nailed to the first one.

Chuck Norris was so famous we was casted for the show Walker, Texas Ranger

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse unable to comprehend english shits on the floor and leaves

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Since when is it any of your business? Cant we live in a world where chickens can cross the road freely without having there motives questioned?

Why couldn't Helen Keller read? Tree sap.

What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

Why does the rabbit go in the hole? because that's where it lives.

sky silverstein

"Mommy! Look, I found a turtle!" "that's no turtle." "Oh..."

What do you call a black man? Rob

Q: What do you call a black man that's flying a plane? A: A pilot.

What's black, white and red all over? A race war

A man walks into a pole He breaks his nose And bleeds to death

What is green, red, and goes 70 mph? A frog in a blender

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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