so a man walks into a bar...... He has a couple laughs over some drinks then went home.

Whats red, black and brown? My anus after a Friday night

How many Babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them

whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

What is the worse joke to tell a Orpahn Knock Knock Whos there not your parents

So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

What's better than winning gold in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket. What's blue and looks like a bucket? A red bucket in disguise.

what did the mother say to the banana? I'm going to eat you like your father.

Q: Why did the boy fall of the swing? A: He had no arms.

Shltskc gw? G

Timmy needed to use the restroom in class, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I go use the restroom?". The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said, "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

What's black and white and red all over? I don't care I have AIDS

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. The fight began and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing you say when you don't want to fight anymore and you let the other person win?" The other guy says to the challanger, "I give up?" Then the challenger yells. "I WIN!"

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

Jimmy: I'm like hey, what's up, hello. Jon: I've already met you.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was probably a cold day.

Why the long face? My face isn't long, it's the same shape as everyone else, retard. I meant why are you sad. I'm not sad.

How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...