A guy went to McDonalds and asked for a cheeseburger: —Can I have a cheeseburguer? —No

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What do you get when you see a black man writing? A man devoted to getting a education.

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Why did Santa die? Because he got diabetes from so many cookies

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Yo mamma is so skinny, she has developed anorexia, a serious eating disorder, which not only affects her, but also the ones that she loves and cares about.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? You shouldn't call him anything. He needs help. -Tag

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How do you discover a gay snowman? If the carrot is in the ass.

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A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

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If these walls could talk - the public would pay large sums of money to see this marvel of science. On a more serious note, they might also tell the cops about the many dead hookers stowed within them.

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I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

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jamie and danel texta like to make love to each other using a gerbal as a toy when they make love they get a african covered in jelly to help them.

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How do you survive the zombie apocolypse? You avoid dieing or being mutated in the living dead.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, In Soviet Russia, Poem writes you.

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What do you call a girl with an iq of 13 Dead

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I had vodka + water and got drunk. had rum + water and got drunk. had gin and water and still got drunk. I've learnt my lesson. NO MORE WATER FOR ME

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when nothing goes right go left because if you go straight you will fall off the cliff

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this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

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Why did the chicken cross the road I don't know

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Who is the most vile man in Britain? Jerry Carr, the guy who works at the casino.

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I was sitting in traffic the other day. I was runover.

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your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

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Q: What's red and bad for your teeth A: A brick

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How do you make your father cry? Poke him in the eye with a shovel, then continue to lower his self esteem with insults.

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what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

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You're so fake, Barbara Millicent Roberts is jealous of you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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