Your mom is so fat, she weighs 732 kilograms.

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What's green and blue, and red all over? Nothing. It if were red all over it wouldn't be green and blue.

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There once was a girl with only one buttcheek. She couldn't go poop. She died.

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What did the helicopter say? Aluminum-minum-minum-minum-minum-mum-mum-mum-mum-um-um-um-um

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Three guys walk into a bar. Soon after another man tries to walk in, but is stopped by the bouncers because the bar was at capacity.

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Looking's for free... Touching's for free.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What color is an orange chicken? Fried rice

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You ask your friend if they want to hear a joke when they say yes tell them that thought you had a joke

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Go fuck yourself.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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Pickle

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wat do u say to a guy with a 3.5 cm choad wats hot tater tot

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In retrospect, I was wrong to microwave all those cats.

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PS3 has the exerrent technorogy and finersse to make excerrent gaming such as... ...ITS RIDGE RACER! RIIIIIIIIIDGE RACEEEEEEEEEEEER!

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Why did the child say he had been a ubused. Answer: because he had been.

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Go away nothing to see here,. I said go away

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whats worse than getting caught by a teacher for chewing gum? getting kidnapped by a giant hawk.

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Why the african children was sad? - Because an octopus bite his arm

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What did Jamaal say when he was in Walmart? I'm Jamaal and I'm in Walmart.

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knock knock who's there? your destiny

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a woman walks into a bar, she was quickly kicked out and escorted back to the kitchen

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How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

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What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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