Why did the old man fall down the stairs? Because he was on his wheelchair.

roses are red violets are blue ill keep u in my heart forever and ower baby to

Your so stupid that when during your baseball game your third base coach told you to run home, you did. The next day, you failed your test.

Why did the white girl become a lesbian? Because she was raped and had no more trust in the male gender.

Knock knock Who's there Guess who? Billy, is that you? Yeah baby I'm home! OMG!!!

HELP!!! I locked myself in my bathroom and can't get out! my laptop is running out of batteries!

CUT MY SOUL INTO PIECES MY NAME IS VOLDEMORT TERMINATION YOU'RE BLEEDING DON'T GIVE A F**K IF I HAVE NO NOSE FOR BREATHING

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Wait what was I saying

Why do cow say moo? Because you touch yourself at night

what did the nail say to the hammer? Hit me baby one more time

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Even though I can't tell Because I am color blind

Did you here about the 2 guys who wanted to go to Paris? They didnt go!

What do you call white people on a bench? NBA What do you call black people on a bench? RTA

Baby you're so hot I have an erection the size of an average penis.

Relax, anyway I hope its just the not not hypnotic suggestion, it would be really disappointing to to know that you are high on weed, even if it is very relaxing, not that I would know, I tried valium once, it kinda increased that sensation you have tenfold. Anyway, what I meant to say was, would you kindly tell me what size your breasts are? Do you shave down there?

One day there was 2 black guys in hoodys with knives in there hand. They tapped me on the shoulder and took my groceries. They then made me a jam sandwich and went on there way

How does Moses like his tea? Hebrews it.

Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

How do you confuse a blonde? To get to the other side

Did you hear about the blonde that crashed her car? No. Is she okay?

what is the world worst joke? this one

A russian gives away vodka.

I couldn't afford haircuts so I purposely contracted cancer

what do you call the quadriplegic man who went water skiing? Skip

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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