I have 20 dollars and 27 cents. How much money do I have? 20.28$ I found a penny.

Q: Whats the difference between water melon and a baby? A: Watermelon is a fruit.

When Chuck Norris claps, his two hands slam together, creating rather loud soud.

Why did the teacher's cat die? It had cat herpes and feline immunodeficiency virus

Why was 2 afraid of three Because it bigger

What's sad about a mexican man dying in a car crash? He had a family that loved and cared for him.

What do you call a man having sex with his own mother. - Gross.

How many electricians with a suitable ladder does it take to change a bulb? If the bulb fitting is now obsolete it may not be possible.

Why did the chicken cross the road. grass was greener on the other side!

Why was the 18 year boy afraid of his dad? Cause his dad butt raped him when he was 7.

Q: Why did the little girl fall off the swing? A: She didn't have any arms.

A schizophrenic walks into a bar. He has dual personalities and does not realize that he has murdered his family.

Your dads so fat he needs to go on a diet

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an orange and finding a worm.

How do you get rid of a pile of dead babies? Call 911 so someone will pick them up and take them to the morgue.

Yo momma so fat, when she turns around, people give her a welcome back party!

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

What's yellow and talks? A talking giraffe.

Why does Toby suck! Because he sucks!

Why was the new born on the orphanage's doorstep? He was an accident.

Q: why did the dad drop his baby? A: she was slippery.

How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

Shark week? More like owl week. Hoo!

What did the leper say to the prostitute? "How much?! No thanks, I think I'll shop around."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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