Today i saw 2 midgets walking.........now there hanging together.....in a tree.....by there necks,,,,...............I f***n hate midgets

The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

What did the rapist say to the child? Contrary to popular belief, I am just a kind old man that likes to hand out sweets to disadvantaged young children. I only got dubbed a rapist when a child crawled into the back of my van as I drove off; the fact that his abusive father was the one who raped him is not my fault.

How do you make a toddler run faster? Chase it with a lawnmower.

Why is did the blonde cross the road? She was trying to catch the chicken.

Why did the baby fall off the swing? It had no arms or legs. Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because I kicked her in the face.

''Hey, this is absolutely true. There's an organization now called 'Draft Dick Cheney for President, 2012.' Yeah. Good luck with that. They tried to draft Dick Cheney five times during Vietnam. That didn't work.

Roses are gray Violets are black Don't judge me I'm color blind>.>

What's 8 foot tall and can't breathe? Ryan Eisenhour

A black, Kenyan man enters a race. He comes in second to last as he didn't practice as much as the other contestants.

How do you get your dog to stop peeing on the floor? SHOOT IT!!!

Roses are black. Violets are black. Black people are black, And you're a douche.

What do you call a black man flying a plane. A pilot.

Why did the girl make a sandwich for her boyfriend? Because she offered to make lunch in order to save money by not going to a restaurant.

wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

Why did whitney Houston become a drug addict? Because she made some very bad decisions in her life.

what is worse - this joke or the last one? what is worse still - sex what is worster - nothing that's not a real word what is wurst? a type of sausage

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his power level? I can't remember... :(

Your mother is so large she finds it difficult to fit into regular sized clothing

If an oak tree falls in the woods, and the tree has 3 squirrel nest in them, then does a whale jizz in the ocean?

Why does Ray Charles always smile? Because he doesn't know he's black.

how many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front and 3 in the back depending on how many people decide to go

What's 1+5 2+4 3+3 4+2 5+1 Whats 6+1 If you said 6 you're stupid.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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