What happens when you throw a yellow rock into a purple river? it makes a splash

How do we stop world hunger? We must first ask ourselves: why don't people eat?

If there's something strange in your neighborhood. Who ya gonna call? The Police.

A Polack walks into a bar. Which makes sense because the bar was in Warsaw.

Why did the christmas tree smell like shit? because pavaroti used it as a dildo

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What time is it when an elephant jumps over your fence? Actually, elephants don't jump.

Why did the pedophile go to the park? He lost his dog.

What's red and smells like blue paint? Fetus Blood. Due to the low concentration of iron, it gives it an aroma of paint.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Go ask your mom.

What do u firmly grasp and stroke until u can't go any longer? A shakeweight....

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was shot In the face. Why did the cow fall out of the tree it was stapled to the monkey.

What's worse than a bee sting? The holocaust What's worse then the holocaust? Two bee stings

What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

A muslim man takes a flight to New York. He lands safely at JFK airport.

The Israeli asked the Japanese guy to open his eyes The Japanese guy said, I'm not squinting you crazy Jew. You're the one that sold me these cheap glasses.

Why didn't Pat's grandma go to his birthday party? Because she died last night

What do the duck and elephant have in common?? Nothing, they are completely different species.

How is a raven like a writing desk? Both have absolutely nothing to do with the other one.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A jew is a human being who will understand and laugh at a joke, while a pizza will just sit there because it is only a delicious thing that people eat.

Two elephants in a bathtub, one says, "Pass the soap." The other one says, "No soap. Radio?"

Yo momma so fat she weighs 400 pounds.

A bear just broke into my house and im scared…...... Oh wait thats just my 350 pound teacher… now i'm even scareder

What do you call a chicken who crosses a road? Nothing, its still a chicken

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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