Roses are red,Lemons are sour,Open your legs and give me an hour.

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Who do you call when there is a ghost in your house? You should problably call the doctor, you may be hallucinating.

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What happens when you get your leg caught in an elevator door? Nothing. It is likely that the elevator has advanced sensory components that won't allow the door to close on your leg.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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I wumbo, you wumbo, he she me,.WUMBO!

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I read a haiku. It was honestly quite good. That's basically it.

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What did the black guy say to the white guy? Hi!

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Whats faster than a mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

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What did the oak tree say to the pine tree? Nothing tress dont speak regardless of the kind.

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whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whroe whore whore whore whroe

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What do you call a boy with one arm one leg and an eye patch? Names

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Q: How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A: You murder her friends and family.

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? rape

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Why did the girl call suicide hotline? Cuz he wanted to kill herself.

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a woman goes to an abortion clinic, kills a baby and still leaves pregnant.

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#Getweird

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

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Why did they bury the firefighter behind the hill? Because he was dead.

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Q. Why did the blonde die drinking milk? A. she was shot in the head by a 22.

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What do an asian, a black man, and a Mexican all have in common? They all belong minorites that at one time have been outcast by society

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How many electricians with a suitable ladder does it take to change a bulb? If the bulb fitting is now obsolete it may not be possible.

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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Why did the man walk into the grocery store? Because he had run out of peanut butter

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girls basketball

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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