guess what my weiner dog did last night? pooped in my bed

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Whats green, and says i'm a frog? A talking frog.

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A man from timbuktu slept on a bed of nails. It was very uncomforable

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What's brown and sticky? My ass.

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whats long and hard and full of seamen a penis

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what do you call a black man with a job? dont know, has never happened.

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What do you call an old lady walking down the street? Widowed.

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Jet fuel doesn't melt steel beams,heat does.

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how do you know your sister is on her period? you dads dick taste like blood.

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Eric is gay Ha

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Q: how do you get an clown off a unicycle A:You hit it with a police baton

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Tim is a bald headed prick with an annoying voice and he looks like a clean shaven Walter White if he was on the same drugs that he was making and he looks like he smokes too much because the wrinkles on his forehead look like lips.

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whats pink, brown, and smells like a banana. monkey vomit?

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Why do children go to school? Because they have to learn.

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Knock knock. who's there? Banana. Banana Who? Knock KNOCK!!! WHO IS THERE!!! BANANA!!!! BANANA WHOOOOO!!! Banana Johnson....... I'M YOUR NEIGHBOR!!!!

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What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because six cheated on seven and slept with nine.

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Rylan Clark

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Q:What's the difference ethernet a corvette and a pile of dead baby's? A:I don't have a corvette in my garage

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3 black guys are in the back of a car. Who is driving? A taxi driver

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? You eat them.

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Why did the man launch his rocket into the sun? He didn't. Overcoming the sun's orbital pull would require your rocket to travel ~7,400,000 mph, which is a velocity that is impossible for today's rockets to reach.

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A black man and a white man enter a public toilet. They both begin to pee at the urinals. The whiteman peers over to the blackman mid-pee. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype and then blushes embarassed by his own latent homosexuality. They both leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself to sleep later that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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