Knock Knock Who's there? Hello there. I am Elder Young and I with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. What would you say if someone were to offer you peace and happiness through all of eternity?

Why did the housewife become a farmer? Because the kitchen was burned down in a horrific accident.

a blonde girl walks into a bar...of soarp, slips, falls, and breaks her spine.

Yo mamas so ugly that when she looked out the window, she was arrested for mooning.

Sir, do you know what time it is? Yes, it is 5:15 PM

Knock Knock: I have full blown AIDS

What junk did she have in her trunk? Mcdonalds because shes fat as hell.

A man is wrongfully convicted of murder and sent to prison. After a lengthy appeals process the guilty verdict is overturned and he walks away a free man.

A kid had wild unprotected sex. He didn't get an STD or enpregnate the girl.

how many babies does it take to paint a wall? it depends on how hard you throw 'em.

What did one jobless cancer cell say to the other? Lets go get Jobs.

A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Hey bill

What do you get if you cross a bomb expert, and a homophobe a blow job

What Do call a dog with an e A doge

Your mom is so ugly, Ew.

Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because I hit her with an axe.

How did freedom die in Europe? It was shot in the chest with a rifle.

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? -Gave her a timeout

Which is heavier, a tonne of feathers or a tonne of lead? It doesn't matter when your loved ones are being torn apart by bears.

What do u get when u lick chicken Answer- Your a retard if you did not figure it out it is obviously chicken taste DERP!

why did bob marley die because he did also he smoked weed he was naughty!

what is the best way to stand out from the croud? open up your butt hole and take a video for to put on dat jumbotron

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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