What did muscleman say to his dad? You know who else is my dad? MY MOM!

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Why didn't the policeman stop the bank robbery? He wasn't there

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You: Hey, I have a good knock knock joke, here, you start! -and if all goes well...- Them: Knock knock! You:Who's there? Them: Uhh...

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Roses are red, violets are blue. i have Alzheimer's, cheese on toast.

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Kid A:We're home alone, you know what that means. Kid B:Cover ourselves in vaseline and slide around like slugs on the kitchen floor? Kid A:Yes

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pauls tuck

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What do you call someone that blows up a plane? Nothing you were on that plane

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Man: You know what sucks? Other man: What? Man: Diarrhea... Know what's worse? Other man: No, what? Man: The smell.

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FUS RO DAH!!!

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Your mama's so hairy, she has to shave occasionally.

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rabbits running in my bathroom!

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What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

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What do you call an animal that is blue, fluffy and lives in the arctic? I don't know and that's why I'm asking you.

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whats black red and white. a zebra with a contagious red rash

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make me a sandwich! what kind?

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A white guy, a black guy, an asian guy, an indian sit together. Canada

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Why did the Albino cross the road? He was going to the skin pigment store.

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How do you make an emo kid cry? He already is.

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knock knock WHO'S THERE?! ARE YOU A SEX CRIMINAL?! NO ONE WANTS TO DO THAT TO YOU MUM!

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Q: Whats the difference between porno and your mom? A: I can masturbate to porno

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. Except when I said muffins I meant Jews. .. I guess it really isn't that funny anymore.

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Two black guys walk into a bar the bartender says get out

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Roses are Red grass is greener every time i think of you i touch my weiner

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What happens when you wake a sleepwalker? Waking sleepwalkers does not harm them. While it is true that a person may be confused or disoriented for a short time after awakening, this does not cause them further harm. In contrast, sleepwalkers may injure themselves if they trip over objects or lose their balance while sleepwalking. Such injuries are common among sleepwalkers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops