What did the coat say to the dog? Nothing, the coat was inanimate

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why couldnt the baby walk through the door? because it had a javeline through its head.

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What do you do to a brain dead man to get his money? Pull the plug.

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why did sarah have to do overtime at work? because i set her house on fire

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How did the boy fall off his bike? A fridge was thrown off him

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Why did Jimmy's grandma never come home ? Her liver failed .

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guess what what ...

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What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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why can't johnny compete in the track race? because he has no feet.

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms

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what do you call lots of jews on a train? Call them what you want they aren't coming back!

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How do you find out a chinese's name? Ask him/her

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red paint is spilled on it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? AIDs.

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What did the douche bag get for Christmas?

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What did the grape say when the elephant sat on it? Nothing, scientific research has shown over thousands of years that grapes cannot talk.

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What's black and red, and covers most of your body? Fourth degree burns. You should say your goodbyes.

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Old McDonald had a farm. He grew corn there, and got reasonably wealthy. Then he retired to the Bahamas.

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Joe has 30 candy bars and eats 25. What does john have now? DIABETIES. Joe has diabeties. Please comment!!!!!!!

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How does a t-rex eat spaghetti? He didn't he ate a velocaraptor instead.

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Two muffins in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says nothing, because muffins cannot talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops