roses are blue violets are red dont judge me

What do you call somebody with no arms or legs and they are stranded in the middle of the ocean? Answer: screwed

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy launched a flare. Nobody came.

why did the man commit scuicide because he was depressed

What do you call a white guy in a mostly black neighborhood? His name.

there were two cyclists cycling down a main road in china at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace, one being chinese and the other irish. why did the irish man get stopped and the chinese man not? because the irish man had in fact raped and murdered a young child in his native home town and then fled the country to china.

What is worse than being killed in a car crash? Having your girlfriend in the car with you.

What do you call a white man sitting between two black men on a bus? A group of three people having a friendly conversation about the upcoming football season.

What did the milk bottle say to the other milk bottle? Nothing. Bottles can't talk you silly goose.

Roses are red Violets are blue I am a gardener

What do you do if your batteries die and you have none left? Go to your nearest battery selling retail store and buy some more.

WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

Why did the black man get laid off? His company was no longer doing well and he was not needed.

roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

Theaters say silence is golden... Trap silence in a jar, make millions.

why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a rapist

I do like haikus even when they are random refrigerator

What's funnier than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? Nothing, infant mortality is not a laughing matter.

A man walks into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian quickly picks out such a book and hands it to him, because to deny him the book would break the conventions of a library.

How do you make an ugly person not ugly? Put a bag over their head. With,, a smiley face.

Why couldn't the old man see? He was deaf

How do you make a dead baby float? Two scoops of vanilla ice cream and two scoops of dead baby.

What do you call a group of Mexicans jumping over a fence? I heat of runners trying out for the Mexican Olympic hurdle team.

Why did Batman brush his teeth? So he wouldn't get bat breath

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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