How can you tell if your wife is dead? She won't have a pulse.

Whats worse than suicide? death

Why did the school fall? Because a hurricane hit.

What did the disabled kid get for his birthday. The same as any other kid.

who likes gay porn and has dirty littlesweeneys thathesticks up his hole? Jahn Willems

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally murdered 6's entire family.

What's the difference between a bowling ball and guacamole? The guacamole is delicious with chips, and the bowling ball is just a bowling ball.

A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

A heavily drunk man walks into a bar and proceeds to die of alcohol poisoning.

What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was clumsy.

Intercom:ALERT! THERES AND EXTREIMEST IS THE SCHOOL! Little kid: Sir, can I borrow that towel on your head? BOOOOOOM!

Q: How many licks does it take to the center of a tootsie pop? A: At least one.

Good job, son.

-What do you call a dog with no legs? -Call it whatever you want, it's not coming!

Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into another apple and finding the other half

Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: toothpaste

So these two guys walk into a bar... Well, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mother a whore.

What's gay and Jewish? Henry Shine

Knock Knock Who's there? The KKK, got any blacks?

Roses are red Violets are blue Dandelions are weeds

teacher: what is your name? student: some people call me attractive (mx)

What is better than one trillion dollars? One trillion and one dollars... duh.

The song Barbra Streisand has more than 2 words.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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