Knock knock. whos their! Grammar police. We'd like to have a little chat.

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What is BIG, STIFF, AND FULL OF SEMEN!!!? A SUBMARINE!!!!!!!

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What's the difference between a hipster and a steaming pile of shit? Many things.

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yo momma is so stupid she went and got her self checked for mental retardedness and it turns out she happens to be autistic.

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a black guy, a handicap, a pervert, and a fat guy are sitting in at a booth in a bar... Your watching family guy

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Do you want to hear a joke? No.

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Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

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Lasers are red, Tasers are blue, and I will use them, to kill you!

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So the man goes to the doctor and the doctor tells the man " you will have to quit masturbating " So the man asks " why" And the doctor said " so I can examine you "

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Q. How do you know when you've had too much too drink? A. Your dead(No because when your dead you can't think.)

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A guy walks into a bar and finds a genie. The genie says he'll grant him 3 wishes. He wished for a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. POOF! All 3 wishes were granted to him. The blonde drinks a shot a tequila, the brunette drinks a beer, and the redhead drinks a whiskey. They had a great time.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? You wouldn't be able to count them if it were dark.

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What happend to the girl who went to school dreased ugly She took the other students advice and whent home and killed her self

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Today, both my parents were killed in a car accient. FML.

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How you know when dislextic

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How did Richard the lion heart get his name? From his parents.

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A lawyer walks into a bar, and due to the repercussions of severe head trauma was never able to do so again.

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So let's pretend two men that had been friends for a very long time, one man asks the other man how he is, so the man tells the other man how he is doing. Then that man asks the other man how he is doing. The two men were engaged in a very interesting conversation. What did the men do next? Nothing. We're pretending, remember?

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What happened to the boy who ate too much? He got type 2 diabetes

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*Science Teacher goes into his class* Teacher:MR MCAAAAAAAN! What's the answer?! MrMccann: I dunno sir. Teacher: WHAT DO YA MEAN YA DUNNO?! HAVE I EVER ASKED YOU A QUESTION YOU DON'T KNOW THE ANSWER TO?! MrMcann: No Teacher:Then answer this. JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN DO YOU KNOW THE ANSWER?!

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I chucked a shit and flushed the toilet.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? If i knew, I'd tell you.

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I am fine, hungry but otherwise fine, I sometimes wish that things that come easy to you, did the same for me or others, excuse me, going to grab a bite, I hope we can chat here for a bit, it is not a chatting site the least. Say? Are you still burning mad at me? If not ill gladly give you a call, but if this is a ploy you are scheming in order to gain my trust I might be killing myself.

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Why do showers have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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