How many sheets did the Asian want on his bed? "You sheet on my bed I kill you!"

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How do you make a kids parents mad? Fly an SR71-BLACKBIRD into him.

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YOOO MOMMA LIKE A BIG MAC FAT JUICE AND ONLY WORTH A BUCK!!!!

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How do you know if there is a monster under your bed? Monsters are mythical creatures that, even if they were real, would be unlikely to sleep under a child-sized bed.

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why did the cow go to the theater? to see the new movies pick one and have a good time.

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Why do mexicans like tacos? Because tacos are a very well liked food and they happen to taste good

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What's the worst part about a plane with 500 people in it crashing? It might leave a dent in the ground.

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Why did god create planet earth? He isn't real.

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no rasist joks

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Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

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Mini mouse was brutally killed n Oakland Now Mickey is a Chinese member of the crips in Compton Remember don't forget to see the new Disney movie, Mickey Goes Gang-Bangin

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Im a Tree... BARK BARK!!!

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A mother is sitting with her son at the park. A nearby man suddenly breaks into uncontrollable coughing. The mother leans over to her son and whispers, 'Smoker's cough.' The son never takes up smoking.

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Why? Why not?

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josh moran where your Bluetooth gone?

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Why was the jewish boy crying? i lied he was happy.

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How did the little boy with cancer run in his running race??? Very Well....

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Why did the mexican buy 50 tacos? Because he was taking them to the orphanage where he grew up. Isn't that nice?

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How do you wake up lady gaga Set her alarm clock to an appropriate time

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What's worse than watching paint dry or grass grow? Watching paint dry on grass.

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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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How many people with Alzheimer's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

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Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: my red painted d*ck

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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