What happened to the man taking a shit? An unfortunate drop of water splashed back onto his arse

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What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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why did jenny drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock who's there? not jenny.

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Knock Knock The occupant uses their peephole and realizes it is a familiar face then proceeds to let them in.

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what falls from the sky, is white, and can kill you a refrigerator

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What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers. -Del Primm

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A White man, a Black man, and an Asian man go to Heaven. They were in a plane crash.

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Q: what's green and fluffy? A: green fluff

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Wanna hear a joke? Niklas Bendter being good at soccer. Wanna hear a funnier joke? Your Mom Wanna hear the funniest joke?

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What do you call an alligator wearing a vest? An extremely talented reptile.

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Dude, you were so drunk last night that you got in a terrible car accident, and now you are paralyzed from the waste down for life.

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What's the mosy hardest game in the world? The Impossible Game.

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a dyslexic man walked his god.

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Anonymous. Anonymous who? Exactly.

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How do you fit 500 babies into a phone booth? With a blender. How do you get them out? Nachos (make a dipping and snacking motion).

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What's worse than Hitler killing six million Jews? All of the Jews. --ZeNaziGermanDoctior

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what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

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Whats worse than cutting yourself with scissors? Being forced into a blender by your baby's ghost.

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why did the elephant fall out of the tree? it was hit by a fridge. why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was sellotaped to the elephant.

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Why did i try to write a funny joke? Cuz i was desperately bored.....

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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why did the chicken cross the road? to try and stop the rapist from sodomizing his young child but his atempts were futile as the rapist shot him and used his blood as lubricant when he skull-raped his dying wife

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What is hard, long, moist, and flesh colored? A hotdog you dirty, dirty bastard!

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A kid asks his mom: "Mom, what would I be when I grow up?" And so his mother answers: "You won't grow up, you have cancer"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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