What musical band do you get if you keep shouting while in the mountain? The rolling stones. What do you get if you keep shouting in a snow covered mountain top? Blizzard Entertainment.

Nero, you got followers, people that believe in you, ironically maybe a lot less now, that I have been giving them the fake illusion that I am you, why did you never reveal your true self? Is there something wrong with you physically? Something you fear being judged upon? I love and admire your work, and you to be honest, I know you are married and all, but my heart has chosen its path, it cant be helped really, believe me, I have tried. Dont lose hope in yourself, sometimes you have to accept that you are smarter, wiser, more compassionate and vulnerable than the rest, allowing yourself to be a vulnerable person, also shows how strong you are, if you shut it all away in order to become "strong", you know you end up alone and forgotten. I understand why someone such as you loses hope in humanity, but as long as you hold into the hope of you having the wisdom and courage required to stand on your own with pride rather than shame of your strength and individuality as a human being, something ever rarer I concur, then you have the right to consider yourself greater rather than some arrogant jackass, believe me, I know the man I am speaking about.

Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a ferrari? You can't find a ferrari in my garage.

roses are red violets are red? trees are red!? who the hell cut themselves?

My uncle got hit by a truck, what was the last thing to go through his mind? The drive shaft.

Me: What's the difference between a zebra and a slice of cheese? You: I don't know Me: Me neither

What do you call black people in a pool? Healthy

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My grandmother has degenerative brain disease, We may need to euthanise her.

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Why are you asking me this question? That's awful and you should be ashamed of yourself.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? ... Well, do you know or not?

Ask me if I want an orange. Do you want an orange? No.

What do you call an attractive woman in a blender? A very rare occurrence.

Why was Eight in court? He was involved in Nine's horrifying disappearance.

Knock Knock. Hello Frank! How'd you know it was me? There is a window next to the door.

Past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense!

James walks into a room he then leaves as the room is full of hot women but he does not find them attractive as he has a girlfriend and is also bisexual.

Knock knock whose there alzheimers alzheimers who get in the van

What is the opposite of a joke ? Racism

why was six afraid of seven? it's a long story, and six doesn't want to talk about it.

What's the difference between a park bench and a black man? Nothing. They're both capable of supporting a family of three.

Why is the alien dead as a door-nail? Because the door-nail was never alive nor could it ever be dead therefore the alien must have never existed just like the life and death of the door-nail.

Knock knock Whos there Who Who who Don't stutter it was just a joke

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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