Timmy had to use the restroom in class one day, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I use the restroom?" The teacher said, "I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said'," When I was using 'can', I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier for asking for permission, as opposed to expressing ability. I though since you were a teacher you would know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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Dave: Hi John! John: I have Aids.

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silver bullet?

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What happens when a man farts a fancy memorial party in a ball room in England... At least 1000 people die somewhere on earth in the time his butt squeezed out that fart. And I'm sure someone gets raped.

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What do a boat and a computer have in common? Nothing

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse's mother had terminal cancer

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patient: Doctor, doctor, i think i'm a lemon. Doctor: racial segregation and presidency is my middle name.

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What's an AntiJoke? A joke that has no comical value.

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kieran is a homosexual

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what did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer

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every cloud has a silver lining

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im typing this without looking at the jetviard. I can;t toycg type thar wekk yet

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What did Luigi say to Mario? You look like a fat Mexican

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A man walks into a bar. It resulted in a concussion and 17 stitches.

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? No one knows, he didn't leave a note.

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How can a hobo become rich? It can't. It died from food poisoning from eating food out of the trash.

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You know what happens when you assume right? Well, you make an educated guess based on prior knowledge to the circumstance at hand.

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Why was the Muslim crying? Because his brother got hit by a bus.

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Who is the dumbest person on the entire internet? Shortpoet-GTD

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How did the mexican cross the border? He went through border patroll, and then later became a legal citizen of North America

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Violets are not blue They are Violet

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Why? Because.

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Why did the black man go through the window of the house? He left his keys inside

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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