What does Jason say when he rages on cod ? I hope your family gets slaughtered in front of him ..

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What has hands but isn't alive? A dead person.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you tell a woman who claims that she is going to yell "fire" in a crowded movie theater? That doing so could result in serious injuries or even death, and that she would be wise to reconsider her future options, as she could be held responsible for any and all problems that arise.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the little boy get for christmas? Nothing. He's jewish

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a chair in the middle of the road? A danger to drivers.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Hickory dickory dock, The mouse ran up the clock, Barbara called the exterminator, Who killed all 10 of them.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead." It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was Charles bleeding, because he was stabbed in the head with a needle

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Roses Are Potato, Violets Are Booze, Im Irish and i hate Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did Johnny play piano with one hand? Because he lost his other one in a mining accident when he was 10. Johnny lives in rural Perú so he had to support his 6 younger brothers and sisters by working in a child factory.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "Yeah, but you make a really great sandwich!"

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the audience walk out of the movie? Because it had just finished.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

FIONN'S ECONOMICS GRADE

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what's the worst part about owning a prius? telling your parents you're gay

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue,All you HATERS of J. Bieber, Go suck your MOTHER.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Man don't you hated when birds shit all over your car! Man I'm glad cows don't fly!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What were the pilots' of Malaysia Airlines Missing plane favourite programs? Lost...

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call Madeline McCann at the bottom of the sea? Drowned Madeline McCann.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Knock knock Who’s there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Insert joke that isn't even an anti joke = The new jokes on anti joke now.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops