Q: what's green and has wheels? A: a john deere tractor

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What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? Nothing... he looked him up and down and spat at him instead.

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A Quadriplegic walks into a bar.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken is subject to speculation.

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What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

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Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

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Why are Indians so bad at football? Curry

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A black man walked into a bar. He cashed in big on workers comp.

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A man walked into the woods with alzheimers......pancakes

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How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE!

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what do you use to blindfold chinese person? dental floss!!

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how much kush does it take to get kushagra high

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Why didnt santa leave presents under the tree? Because santa doesnt exist.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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So I'm balls deep in this 9 year old...

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

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The good part of "Age" of Ultron? THANOS REIGNS! Disagree? Just leave the green thumb and fuck off!

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What's brown and sticky? Feces.

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Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

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Knock Knock Who's there? Just open the damn door.

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Knock Knock. Please stop peddling your religion on my doorstep. .

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A man walks into a bar. It's a fine establishment. He orders a couple of beers and takes a cab home like a responsible man would. He is then killed with a croquet mallet.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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Hey, in case you are around and still wonder how he got out. Anonymous tip from yours truly, if he had remained there, you would all have taken the blame. Just stay away from the deep web, and I wont be forced to come get all of you as well. For a long while I was suspicious that you might have been leaking information regarding me and all of us, but then the rules changed and information regarding Point Zero, subtle hints and such, began spreading, it has been removed, nobody will know what Intel was sold, so yeah, he was a mole, he is no more, for this I am sorry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops