Knock knock Who's there The military, your son died last night.

Yo' mama's so black the dark couldn't even see her.

What do you call a Jew reading a book in the library? Steve Goldberg. .

A blond, burnette, and red head walk into a bar. They sit together and enjoy a few drinks while catching up on eachother's lives.

What did the fish say to the Asain man Nothing. a fish can not talk

What did the rabbit buy the Jewish duck for Hanukkah? Nothing, animals don't celebrate holidays.

Oh and Nero, what are you suffering from? Is it dangerous? Are you dying or something? Please dont scare me like that again.

Immigration Laws

Q: Why didn't johnny get any Christmas presents? A: Because he died in a house fire 3 years ago.

What do you call a guy with a rubber toe? . . . . . . . Roberto

i need a pooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

what did the homeless man get for christmas hyperthermia

What is big, long, hot, and firm? An erection due to the arousal of a woman's sex appeal.

What's the difference between a rhinoceros? I DIDN'T MURDER MY BROTHER OKAY!!!!!

A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

field day?

Why did the mexican mow the lawn. Because the grass in his front yard is longer than he likes it .

Q: What did the newborn dumpster baby say to the raccoon? A: Nothing. Newborn babies cannot talk.

What do you call a blackjack man driving a car? An average citizen.

How can you confirm that Saturday comes after friday, and that Sunday comes after Saturday? consult Rebecca Black.

what did the girls scream when they were being stalked? skydragon

Why couldnt Helen Keller drive? Because She was Blind you sexist asshole

Whats funnier than Dane Cook. The Holocaust.

Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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