What are the last words of a child dieing of cancer ? Nothing because he is to ill to speak

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Mickey Mouse peed on a house what color was it? It wasn't a color, or any pee for that matter. Mickey Mouse is a fictional character for children's amusement.

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Knock knock Who's there? Nobody Oh, ok

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What did Rihanna remember when she corrected Chris Browns tweets she can't remember last thing she saw was a fist

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where did you get those clothes? at the toilet store.

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How do you starve a black man? Tell welfare to cancel food stamps

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John had 50 candy bars and he ate 45 what does he have...... Diabeaties

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They say "You are what you eat." In that case, I'm a pussy.

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Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

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What did the dog say to the other dog? Were both dogs!

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What did one traffic light say to the other? Nothing, as traffic lights are incapable of thought as they are not living.

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who is smarter than a human? a nerd

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What's the difference between an ant and a dinosaur? They are both birds, apart from the ant and the dinosaur

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I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

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Your moms so old. She might die soon

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it doesn't have the capacity for rational thought and decision-making and was subsequently hit by a car.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why does the pope doesn't use this finger? (raise a finger) That's mine!

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Wife: "I suggest you check properly next time you lose your keys so that you find them quicker" Husband: "I suggest that next time I sit down and have a beer while I wait for Doc Martin and his time machine to give my keys back.

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She look like Ms. Universe and I'm bout to be in that black hole

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Why was the man wearing all white? He was a part of the Ku Klux Kan.

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Dogta I don got da aids yeah? Well Sigh... Man I am so sorry, I got the positive, and the uh.. Good news... Whats the good news? I hate you! Whats the positive news? You dont have teh aids.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra

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Why couldn't the 10 year old see the Pirate Movie? Because his weekend was busy!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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