patient: Doctor, doctor, i think i'm a lemon. Doctor: racial segregation and presidency is my middle name.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead get pulled over. The cop says "Yuck!" Then shoots the redhead because red hair is disgusting.

Why did the sloth swing from the tree? It hung itself.

I GOT YOUR BUTT PUSSY!

Two men walked into a bar. Only one came out. What happened? One Passed out.

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? I raped your mom and she swallowed my load, k

How do you stop a bus from hitting you?? You throw small children to impede the progress of the bus.

what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

What did the man with cancer get for his birthday? A gravestone.

Roses are red bullets are led if you don't take me back now i'll shoot you in the head!

Why did the man run away from the woman? He forgot his rape kit.

Q. What do you call a bashed black man laying on pavement? A. Neapolitan

What did the flight attendant get for Christmas? A Trebuchet from medieval times dating back to the 12th Century CE.

It's bright in here *puts on? sunglasses* Ahhh, that's better...

Q: What do you call a room full of black people? A: A Social Gathering.

95556

How many days did abraham lincoln take a crap for? Turquoise because pancakes cannot fly without wings during the summer unless giraffes smell pineapple on tuesday.

A: Knock Knock B: (No Reply) Nobody is home and the man trying to get in will come back later and try again.

Hey i just met you, and this us crazy! Heres some toilet paper, wipe my ass maybe?

Why is 6 scared of 9? Because 9 is a zombie.

why did the chicken cross the road? because he was trying to kill himself in the fastest and easiest way due to his drinking problems, which in the first place separated him him from his wife, who is fighting with him in court for custody of there only child ,Steven. He can not even pay the rent on his apartment or hold a job to pay child support..he is also in debt.

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't suck its dick.

What did the traffic light say to the car? Bye.

why did the 60 year old touch the little boy's penis? because he was a pedophile.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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