Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows because a chicken is incapable of communicating it's reason to humans.

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An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

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What's the difference between deer nuts and beer nuts? Beer nuts are $1.50 and deer nuts are under a buck.

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NA LINDOL BA KAPAG NATALON ANG MATATABA :8

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What's worst than getting hit by a car. -Getting hit by a truck.

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rabbits running in my bathroom!

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It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

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roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

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A horse walks into a barn.. The farmer says "why the long face?",This frightens the horse ultimately leads to the farmer getting kicked in the teeth

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Knock knock Who's there? The bank. We've come to evict you from your house.

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What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

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What do you call a guy eating a sandwich? Whatever his name is.

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Q: what did the dog say to the cat? A: nothing dogs can't talk

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What's a Gigawat? I made it up.

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Why'd the guy fall off the building? I pushed him

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Tony Soprano walks into a diner

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Put chromosomes in advertising. Because you know, Sex Cells

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what has wheels and drives? a boat i lied about the wheels

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Why did the plane leave late? Because they were out of Kellogg's® Breakfast Cereal.

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What's black and blue and hates sex? The ten year old in my trunk

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I can't wait to shove my finge in you

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Knock knock Whose there? Nobody Nobody who? ......................................

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What's brown and sticky A stick

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Mugger: Give me all your money. Victim: No. Mugger: Okay. (Moves on to find his next victim)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops