- Anti Joke

Knock knock Who's there? Owl Owl who? Owl Johnson, your neighbor. Oh hi Owl, please come in.

cerleb i wrote the one about melons!

An anti joke a day... really doesn't actually do that much

What did the man say to the woman before he had sex with her? "May I have sex with you, please?"

Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead!!!!

Why could susan not get up? Because her limbs were hacked off by a African militia group.

Why did the blonde stay in the five-star hotel? She had enough money.

A man walks into a bar, He is a severe alcoholic and is slowly drowning himself in booze. The man exits the bar after several hours of heavy drinking and walks home. He enters his home to discover a man in bed with his wife. After the first ten seconds of paralyzing rage, he grabs a .44 Magnum and brutally murders his wife and her bed mate. The man realizes he has woken up his two month old, and after thinking of the horrible act he has committed, he promptly raises the pistol to his temple and pulls the trigger. Oh, I almost forgot, the man was schizophrenic and has never been married.

Whats black and can run fast? a panther.... racist

Balboa. Watch as Apollo Creed`s nephews son is trained by Rocky Balboa`s grandson`s neighbor to participate in the new highschool musical will they win this years golden plate? Spoiler: No they did well but lost to Clubber Lang`s and Ivan Drago`s gay sons adopted lovechild`s ballet number. But people kept cheering "BALBOA BALBOA BALBOA!" As Rocky Balboa`s grandson kept yelling "ADRIAAN, ADRIAAAAAAN!" while a picture of Rocky`s grandchild is shown in the background together with the American flag. Moral: This script may or might not have been made for a quick cash in, anyway, its coming out the next radioactive winter 2705.

What's the difference between an alligator and an argyle sweater? There are far too many conceivable differences between the two objects to be able to give an actual definite variance between them.

What did the little boy say to a stranger? Nothing. He is very shy, and his parents always said to never talk to strangers.

Well, its Eliza again, sorry to bother you Nero, I always thought you where good looking but I know that when it comes to you its not about the looks, you are far more than meets the eye. Neo-Nero was the guy we met at a certain meeting, the arrogant guy with the big forehead whose arms where shaking remember? I wont reveal more for his sake, he did not mean bad, he was just angry like the rest of us and felt responsible, again like many of us. So when can we meet you? I assume you wont be arriving soon, but Id really apreciate seeing you again, and considering neither I nor my parents (I asked them) have the money to come visit you, id appreciate a loan or something.

What's tall, has a really long neck, and eats leaves? My tall vegan neighbor's giraffe

Q: What Did Alakazam Use To Listen Gangnam Style? A: He Used Psybeam.

Why did Isaac cross the road? Because Jake did Why did Isaac cross the road? Because mum told him not to Why did Isaac cross the road? Because Maya was there

Why did the pot-head have red eyes? He got soap in them.

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag? One is plastic and dangerous to children. The other holds groceries.

What was the last thing that went through the crashing helicopter pilot's head? The propeller.

Giant scorpions, red roses, adoption, the holocaust, bars, changing light bulbs, and fridges.

How do you confuse a blonde? You put her in a round room and tell her to find the corner.

Why haven't any women go to the moon? Cause it still doesn't need cleaning.

a older brother and a lil brother have bunk beds, one night the older brother has his gf sneak over, they are going to have sex. he tells his gf, "say lettace for a new positon and say tomato for stop", they start and she screams, "lettace, tomato, lettace, tomato". then the lil brother says " will you guys stop making salad, ur getting mayonase all over my face!!!!"

Lets just say I work for some important people, not the feds that is for sure, ill tell you when we meet, not here. As for my condition, lets just say that I am profusely bleeding noseblood now and that is because I forgot to take my medication, and if I had no medicaions at all, I would have begun bleeding out of me ears end eye sockets, and ironically id die from a lot of other shit before bleeding to death, so thats not even the case. Its nothing common, but I bet people could find out about it pretty fast on wikipedia, and as much as I like throwing shit on random people here, I dont like bothering anyone with my problems, in this case, it came kinda sudden and unexpected, and I dont mind sharing my deepest aspects including this with my best friends, of which one of them you clearly are love.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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