A:Knock knock B:Who´s there? A:Beat B:Beat who? A:Beat your ass if you don´t open that door!!

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One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

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What did silly Billy with no arms get for Christmas ? Gloves.. why did silly billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a microwave.. Why did silly sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Whos there? Not sally..

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What happened to my sunglasses?

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ask me what my temperpedic bed is like. ''whats it like?'' i dont know ive never had one actully.

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Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

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A car with four Mexicans drives off of a cliff. What's the bad news? They were my friends.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. He was stapled to the baby.

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What happens if you drop a baby of a cliff It dies

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q.how do u kill a jew? a.you glue a penny to the bottom of a pool

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why did the girl slap joe? he had a boner.

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Charles missed the stop sign. Charles can't read.

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What's sweet and tastes like candy? Candy, now get in the van.

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Two guys walk into A bar. The third one ducks.

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A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

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Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

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Why did Billy kill Joey? Joey had sex with Billy's wife... and Billy wanted revenge.

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Why did the horse go to the doctor? It had a heart disease.

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Q: What did the air freshener say to the car??? A: Nothing. Air fresheners are inanimate objects

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Roses are blue, Violets are red, I have to go to the bathroom now...

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Why did the boy cry? Because he was a crybaby

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two flowers in a meddow recently bloomed a cow came over and ate them, and the cow died of herpes the next day

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Michael J Fox may not be able to draw a perfect circle but he sure can jerk off like a champ

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Where did Little Johnny go when the bomb hit? Everywhere.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops