What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Knock knock Who's there Isabelle Isabelle who? Is-a-bell necessary on a bike

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Incidentally,on the subject of friends, when do you actually classify someone as a friend? Is it: When you have been to each others' house; When you have had an intelligent conversation more than once; When you have stayed for dinner; Or perhaps simply when each has decided that the other is worth the air that they breathe? [L]

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What do you call a 3 legged dog on a red unicycle? An unlikely set of circumstances.

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Knock knock Who's there? Derek the crazy man in the village and I have come to shoot you.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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whats worse than dieing in an airplane? jumping out of the airplane to save yourself and emediatly getting shredded by the massive engine you did not have the wits to see.

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A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, building up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

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What did the female lady person say to the baby? Get Some.

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What's the difference between a man and a woman? Generally speaking- biology, except in cases of transexuality.

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Knock knock Who's there The police The police who? Ma'am your son is dead

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the farmer that was trying to kill it.

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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knock knock. who's there? no one. no one who? no one who?

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Your sex life.

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a guy named bob likes sprinkles on his ice cream.

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What did the tree say to the kite? She got hit by a fridge.

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why wouldnt you come to the dark side? i spit in the cookies

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Chip and Dale walk into a bar. Chip is black now.

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What is the difference between a duck? One leg is both the same.

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you know whats worse than cantaloupe? no cantaloupe

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Q: Whats the best part of a bald pussy? A: After you put the diaper back on you perv!

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What do you call a black man that likes potatoes? Whatever his name is.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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