Guest what? Dog

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's green and eats rocks? A green rock eater What's purple and eats rocks? It hasn't been discovered by science yet...

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How did I do in the running events? Not that good, I'm a paraplegic.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why did the roof cave in? It was not structurally sound do to poor architecture

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the old lady talk to a tree? She had Alzheimer's and was going to die.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Is your daddy a thief? Because he stole my wallet.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what is black and blue and hates sex? the ten year old in my trunk.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the boy cut his hair? Because he was large.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How many bears does it take to screw in a light bulb? None; it’s a fairly menial task requiring little more than a single human hand. Requisitioning any number of bears for the effort would be an extremely dangerous “Rube Goldberg”-esque solution to simple problem.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What would Michael Jackson do if he were in a room full of kids? Nothing, he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Where did the RICH black man go to? His home

thumb_up thumb_down +13

You sick fiend

thumb_up thumb_down +13

a black man, a jew, a mexican and an irish man walked into a bar and the bartender says: This is joke right??

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A worm in your intestinal tract.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what is black and hangs from the tree in my back yard? a moldy apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did jimmy say when his brother had been mean to him all day and he was about to get a straw and his brother took the last one? That was the last straw!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What happened when Johnny fell off of his bike? He suffered a very tragic and fatal brain hemorrhage resulting in a lower population by a minute percentile that is undetectable by the US Census.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q-What's the good thing about dating a girl volleyball player? A- She's a Girl

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Because he was bringing food to support his wife and 3 kids whom were very hungry and needed it to survive.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you say when a black person is walking through wal-mart? Prisoner

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you kill Helen Keller? With a gun.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Did you hear about the guy in town living in a tyre, he got a puncture now hes living in a flat.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why was Hellen Keller blind and deaf? Because she was a girl.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops