Why did the man drink a glass of water? Why not?

Knock knock Who's there? Me Me who? Just me

how many dead babies can you fit into a blender? 17 how do you get them out? Tortilla chips, but you'd be arrested by that time anyway because you just murdered 17 babies

Tin is a chemical element with symbol Sn (for Latin: stannum) and atomic number 50. It is a main group metal in group 14 of the periodic table. Tin shows chemical similarity to both neighboring group-14 elements, germanium and lead, and has two possible oxidation states, +2 and the slightly more stable +4. Tin is the 49th most abundant element and has, with 10 stable isotopes, the largest number of stable isotopes in the periodic table. It is a silvery, malleable other metal that is not easily oxidized in air, obtained chiefly from the mineral cassiterite where it occurs as tin dioxide, SnO2.

"Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave."

What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

A blind man walks into a wall.

A man walks into a bar and sees an attractive blonde. He is afraid of talking to her so he goes home and masterbates himself to sleep.

What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

How do you make a car? You build it.

What's more boring than watching grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

What did Washington say to his men before they got into the boat? Men, get in the boat!

what is red and smells like paint red paint

You know what they call men who make kitchen jokes? Single.

whats the difference between ian bothom and david gower? shredded wheat.

How many babies can fit in a dumpster? Let's not find out...

CJISTHEBEST Sticks and stones may break my bones because i have osteoperosis.

Q. How many infants does it take to paint a wall? A. Depends how hard you throw them...

Where do you find a baby with no arms or legs? Where you left it.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. They order a few drinks, chat, and walk out.

what do you call cheese thats not yours? A: stolen cheese.

How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

why was the black guy running from the cops? i dont know either

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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