What do you call someone with no arms, one leg,and an eye patch? names

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was dead. Why'd the other monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was stapled to the dead monkey!

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The scientists of Cambridge have finally developed a cure for feeling low! They have presented it in the style of a song. See if you can spot the hidden frequency wavelengths when you sing it out lout. They are what make you feel better. You've got to LOVE the world! Be a friend! And when You're down you've got to get up again! And when your blue, here's what you do. Just sing this happy tune! However if that fails, then you should consider getting professional help.

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If a tree falls in the woods does it make a sound? It depends on how sound is defined

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rocky is here again.......................

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Hickory Dickory Dock. 2 mice ran up the clock. The clock struck one.. and the second one got away with major injuries, dying in a hospital three days later. The clock is now serving its 8th year in jail out of 25 years, and does not regret anything.

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What is Hitler's favourite Yu-Gi-Oh card? Blue Eyes, White Dragon.

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Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

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what did the stop sign say to the car? nothing.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm a dog.

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I love telling anti jokes rather than jokes because I was born with a rare case of ebola and suffer from alcoholicationism

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A man told another,"You suck." The insulted man finished the sentence,"On juice boxes."

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What is the Pirates favorite letter? C

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why did the chicken cross the road? because there were no cars coming and it seemed like a safe time to cross

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once, my brother took my lard and gave it to the less fortunet

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Why did the Asian man have to sit down to pee? Because he had no legs.

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Llega San Pedro le dice a dios y se va.

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why do gingers have no friends? They are non sentient stems that are simply not capable of interacting with intellectual humans

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Why didn't the scientist discover a cure for apathy? He simply lost interest in it.

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Bill went into a store and bought a bagel. However, after eating it, he realizes he meant to buy a doughnut. He tells the cashier that he meant to order a doughnut, and asks for his money back. The cashier says no and the man leaves.

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What is the difference between a peasant and a pheasant? One's a bird.

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What do you call a black man in the south? An example of diverse America

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Pull my finger. Not right now. I'm watching The Price is Right.

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Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt, he got hit by a car and died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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