what do you call when a penis is inside a vagina? sex

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whats black dirty gross and sits on the porch all day? a trash bag

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What did the boyfriend give his girlfriend for Valentine's Day? AIDS

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what is the different between a prostitute and your wife one is on contract and the other pay as you go

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What's greenish blue, smelly, and mushy? The fungus under my sink.

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What's worse than being forced to drink your own urine and eat a disabled kids poop? James Holmes (Ironic that the text I had to type in to post this was "I'M BATMAN".)

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What is the difference between a feminist and a gun? A gun only has one trigger

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What do you do if life gives you lemons? Whoa... where did these lemons come from?

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whats worth than finding half a dead worm in your apple getting rapped by your step dad

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Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

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An American, a German, and a Mexican walk quickly into a room. They were late for a work meeting.

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What did Kane Larkin get on his birthday? Cancer...

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there were three men in a car, Poop, Shut Up, and Manners. They were driving in a truck when poop fell out of the car. Manners went to get him. Shut Up parked somewhere that he wasn't supposed to so the police man came to him. He asked him what his name was and he said "Shut Up" because that was his name. The police man said "Where are your manners?" then Shut Up said,"He went to go scoop up poop".

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A Dyslexic man went to a posh, bought a badnana, and put it no his neck, and lawked around twon.

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aodhan hearty

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Why did the man take off his pants A: because they were uncomfortable to sit in

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The little girl asks her father "Daddy why is santa fat?" "you have to exist to lose weight" he answered

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YOU

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why did the dog cross the street? because it saw a squirrel

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What looks like half an Apple? The other half.

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Did you hear about the Dislexic Devil worshipers? They sold their soul to Santa.

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Three Men walk into a bar. One with a ax and one with a Shovel. The other one isn't holding anything. *Boom* (\ _ /) (x . x)

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What happened after the lawer jumped off the bridge? His family mourned his loss for years.

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An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walked into a bar. The Englishman ordered a lager, the Irishman ordered a Guiness, and the Scotsman ordered tap water.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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