whats long, black, and smells like shit? a big turd

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I like my women like I like my pancakes: Flipped over, inanimate, motionless, and covered in my syrup.

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Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refridgerator

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A kid goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor! it hurts when I do this!" The Doctor says, "Well, because you have been diagnosed with ALD, and to make matters worse you are allergic to rapeseed oil" The child then cries because he will never live past 40 years old

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Why did the editor lose his job at a poetry magazine? Because he's worthless.

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whats big and white and falls from the sky\ Refrigerator

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Wanna hear a funny story? Sure. Ok,

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, WHO THE HELL $#!T IN MY GARDEN?!

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An asian and a black guy walked into a bar. An ambulance rushed to their aid as they were in great pain and had a slight chance of becoming paraplegic.

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Why did Bruno Mars explode? He caught a grenade for ya.

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why did the boy stay home from school? it was saturday

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What did the athiest get for christmas? Well he shouldn't get anything becuase he doesn't belive in jesus.

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Why was 2 afraid of 81? Because seven eight nine.

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What's the difference between bird flu and swine flu? If you have bird flu, you need tweetment. If you have swine flu, you need oink-ment.

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how many black guys goes it take to screw inalightbulb? just one, but inalightbulb was feeling rather slutty today, so 2.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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What do black people and tables have in common? Nothing.

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why does the world spin? Chuck Norris says so

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How many dinosaurs does it take to fill a pool? I don't know and no one will know as they are extinct organisms

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What would you call the baby of an elephant and a rhinoceros? Nothing. They are two entirely different species and therefore cannot breed.

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BTMG JOAN!"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOP OF THE MORNING FREE MEAT NO SANTA THIS YEAR BONE FOUNDATIONS MOUNTNORRIS WHY IS THAT BAG MOVING?????????? MR MO MOLESTOR SHIT STAINS VEGETABLE GUN OPERATION SBB OPERATION SBB (THE AFTERMATH) #SL #NSL TIN SCHACK SKI LIFT MILK STAINS NATHAN: 5 - SEATS: 0 GREEK LETTER STU THE SO

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why did the horse drop its ice cream Because it doesnt have thumbs so it cant hold the ice cream

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Ask me for £1000 Can I have £1000 No get a job

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There must have been something that peaked her interest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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