Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the baby fall off the swing? Because i hit it with a bat.

Why did the basketball team from Detroit win the youth championship? Because they had a good coach amd dedicated, hard-working players.

Wait, I am sleepy as the world which spawned you Nero, but which comment is mine again?

Why wasn't the TV remote working? It was out of batteries.

Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was strapped to the first monkey.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

Q.What did the homeless kid get from santa? A. Play Doe. Because he was a good boy. Q.what did the Rich Kid get form santa? A Coal. Because he was a bod boy. The rich kid then got mad and threw the coal at the homeless kid hitting him on the head which killed him of enturnaly bleeding.

A rabbit hops into a bar and sits on a stool, he then asks for a carrot, the barman didn't have a clue what he said because it was a rabbit so gives him a carrot to be generous. The bar door slams open and animal control put him in a cage and take him away. The moral of the story is that you should never let rabbits in your bar.

Roses are red, violets are blue, you have a disease, it's called cancer.

Why did the asian lady buy the large shirt instead of the medium? Because the medium didn't fit

A: Knock, Knock B: Whos there? A: Noone, the door and the visitor are both existential figments of your imagination.

once you go Persian, there is no other alternative

One time, I called the police, but it was actually a fire. So my neighbors died.

Roses are red, Potatoes are yellow, ERMAHHHGERDDD PERRDERRRDERRR

how how does a black man jump. the same way anyone else does

all the kids had fun

knock knock who's there? the man the man who? the man who murdered your whole family

Why aren't anti jokes funny? Idk. Watermelon in your pants, you're adopted.

What do you call somebody who can't walk? Handicapped

How do you make a mailman cry? Kill his family.

What's the difference between a melon and a baby? You have to cut open the melon before you can eat it

A princess decided to kiss a frog in the hopes that it would turn into a handsome prince, as she found none of her suitors to her taste. The frog was incredibly poisonous and she died of total organ failure three days later.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have cancer, Herp Derp

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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