Relax, it simply would not be working out for you if your mother was nearby, you see, the subconcious is limited by the concious mind, so if your subconcious can detect your mother (or anyone but me nearby) your conscious mind goes "uh oh" and it stops. Oh, right, and considering you can still type, how about we increase the effect into... I dunno, six billion? Yeah six billion. Anyway, the next time you want to experience it, just poke your nose, and since we do not want you to poke your nose off, you only do it once and you can yourself decide when it ends, at this level you should not be able to type, but if you want to type you can of course turn it off.

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Noses are red, Lips are blue, I have hypothermia, So do you.

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Your a christain on a lovely vacation with your family a querr waalks by. What do you do? you push the queer of the edge.

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25 kids go into the water. shark in the water. 10 come out. Ice cream man deals with the rest of 'em.

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A Hispanic walks into an alleyway and sees two of his rich friends. He desperately needs money and only has enough time to shoot one of them because he sees the police following him. He decides which one to shoot... Wait, if he has enough time to think about this shouldn't he just shoot both of them?

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dickdickvdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdick

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A quadriplegic walked into a bar, and... oh, whoops, nevermind.

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Whats the difference of a pile of dead babys and a lambrogini? One of them is not inside of my garage.

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Did you hear about the one about the man who walked into the library? He likes reading

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Why do deer have horns? Because god made them that way.

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Why did the black man buy a gun? because he wanted to go hunting.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock...

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What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Penguin. Penguin who? The penguin who apparently lives next door and somehow developed the ability to successfully interact with other species through gesture and retoric.

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roses are red violets are blue the sugar bowls empty so is your head

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what do u call a turtle with no shell? Larry

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An irish man and a lebanese man jump off a cliff who wins? No one it wasnt a race

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What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? ProtestS from Anti GM activists.

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Why would a dog sniff another dog's butt hole? Because that is what they do.

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How many blondes does it take to change a diaper? About a thousand

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If your riding your bicycle down the railroad tracks and your wings fall off how much icecrea does it take to fill a upside down doghouse

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rose's are red violets are blue I have touretts blblblblblblblblbbl

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Why was the boy sad? Because his mother and father had just disowned him.

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What sport was the man with one leg excelling in? Ass kicking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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