Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Your neighbor

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A grasshopper walks into a bar and the bartender says "Hey! We have a drink named after you!" The grasshopper doesn't respond because he is a grasshopper and therefore can't talk.

A man walks into a bar hes later assassinated and mourned by his family.

why did mad is on home s walk becuaes a isnt a number

Have you read Shakespeare? Dunno. Who wrote it? Shakespeare.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? A worm in your asshole.

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

Why do Mexican's wear pointy shoes? Because its part of their culture and is used as a sign of dignity when dancing to tribal music

three gay men were sitting in a hottub. a condom floats to the surface. why the hell were you watching them?

What did the previously pregnant teen flush down the toilet? Her beloved pet goldfish who recently died. She had already given birth to a healthy baby the previous year.

What did Batman tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile

What did the dog say when the tiger bit him? Nothing. Dogs don't talk.

I have 13 hedge hogs in one hand and 4 pineapples in my van how many pikelets does it take to cover the roof. Purple because aliens dont wear hats.

What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything.

What do you get a when you cross a chocolate bar and some haribo? A disease complex characterized by persistent hyperglycemia caused by insufficient insulin production or resistance to the metabolic action of insulin. Diabetes mellitus (DM) is generally classified as insulin-dependent (IDDM, type I), non-insulin-dependent (NIDDM, type II), or secondary diabetes mellitus

How do you confuse a blonde? I guess the same way you confuse someone of any other hair color.

Q. Why did the kid drop his tennis racket? A. Because he got run over by a tank!

What the difference between a rabbit an a eagle? They both fly except for the rabbit

roses are red, violets are blue, I got pneumonia so now I am too

What does a cookie and the twin towers have in common? They both crumble.

Roses are red, Violets are violet They are not blue You stupid twat

A Mexican man, an American man, and an Italian man go to a bridge. The mexican said "we have too much of this in our country!" and throws pasta into the water. The Mexican man says "we have to much of this in out country!" and throws a taco into the water. The American throws in the Mexican man and says "we have to much of these in our country!"

What's the one good thing about being a paraplegic? Nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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