5 little monkeys jumping on the bed, one fell off and bumped his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "He has a mild concussion."

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Why did the fish cross the road? Because the chicken was carrying an aquarium.

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Knock Knock. Who's there *gun shot*

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How are jello and frankenstein alike? Both green, both alive, and bill cosby didn't make me want either.

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So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

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whats worse than 100 babies strapped to an atomic bomb? 1 baby strapped to 100 atomic bombs

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-Look! Up in the sky! -It's a bird! -Yep.

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Whats the difference between a quarter and a penny? 24 cents.

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A blind man walks into a bar. He cannot read the drink menu.

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Q.Why did the boy fail to complete his homework? A. He was a loaf of bread

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A man goes to the hospital he says to the doctor while poking his leg it hurts here. Then he pokes his arm and here. Then his head and here. "Yes" the doctor says you've broken your finger.

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A hat fell into the Indian Ocean. What happened to the hat? It got wet

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What do you call a gay Chinese math teacher? A gay Chinese math teacher.

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Sidney Crosby comes face-to-face with Alex Ovechkin. The Penguins were playing the Capitals.

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A snail walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "hey we don't serve snails here," and flicks him across the street. 3 years later the snails walks back into the bar and said, "why'd ya do that for??"

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Whay is jerry so bad at parallel parking? He just got a sex change yesterday.

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what did the pregnant women get? A miscarriage

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Why did the girl have twins she was raped

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What did the Asian man say to the Mexican man? Nothing, due to the language barrier.

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What does a carrot and a potato have in common? They're both not chocolate

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What happens when a blond walks into a bar She buys a drink

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Why do basketball players wear bibs? They don't.

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Whats invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops