A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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How did the baby survive the car accident? He didn't. He was killed on impact.

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Q Why did the chicken cross the road? A Because it couldn't fly

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Why did the black man go to the back of the bus? The only unoccupied seats were back there.

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What do you call a black man with a peg leg? Disabled

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Knock Knock Who's There? Poop. Poop who? HAHAHAHAHAHA you said poopoo

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Why did the woman get into a car accident? She was blind.

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why did Sarah fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? not sarah

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What does the Bill in Bill Clinton stand for? Bilious.

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How does Hitler tie his shoes? with little Nazis!

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whats brown and stick? brown paint that has not dried yet.

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a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

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Whats worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple...

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Where do cows go in their free time? burger king.

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knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

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Lets just say some of my boys owed me a favor, and that if we where all "clean slate workers" I would never have been able to pull some favors out of the higher ups. As far as for "these Shadows" of yours, I know nothing, while I invented the encoding format for the messages you use, I intend keeping it to myself. People here will still assume this is bullshit unless you get somebody to hack this site, believe me, its pretty damn easy to retrieve whatever data might have been lost.

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Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

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Yo mama is so ugly that she won an award for that

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How do you leave a guy in suspense ...

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How can a black person and a white person be friends? The civil right's movement.

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A guy went to McDonalds and asked for a cheeseburger: —Can I have a cheeseburguer? —No

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Two muffins are in the oven They didn't say anything.

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench isnt going anywhere.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops