How do you scare a blonde? Paint yourself yellow and call yourself big bird.

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

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Who jumps the highest in basketball? The mascot because he has a trampoline.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

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Why was Luke named Luke Skywalker? Because he walks to skies.

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what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

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Why doesn't Helen Keller know how to drive? because she's a woman.

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A bartender walks into a bar. I know what you're thinking. You think he works there but that is not correct. He works at a different bar. Anyways, he buys a few drinks and leaves. He was impressed with the service.

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what did the crow say do the dead gazelle? - nothing the crow ate it

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What does these 3 words all have in common? terrifiant, hrollvekjandi, Przera?aj?ce They all mean the same thing describing Ian! CREEPY

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis. -Rivrawr

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Doctor Doctor Who? It is a science fiction show about a time traveller

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What do you call a girl with one leg? Eileen

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Why did the man drop one dozen long stem roses? Because he was hit by a taxi cab

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Little Birdy: Are you my mother? Man: No, I'm a murderer. Get in the truck.

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An irishman walks into a bar and drinks 6 pints of guiness. He then drives himself home and savagely beats his wife and children.

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Two cows were in a feild, one said "moo" and the other said "i was going to say that!"

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Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

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A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

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What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

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Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

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In the movie Sherlock holms, why is Sherlock Holms gay?? --------------Because he is chasing "blackwood"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops