How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? It varies. Alzheimer's is a very slow progressing disease, and many people suffering from it are capable of a wide variety of a number of everyday activities.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: why didn't the asian boy ask for a calculator? A: you don't need calculators to make shoes

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A Quadriplegic walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you say when you see a black guy? Hello,how are you today?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What is a black guys favourite thing to eat? Food.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was involved in a homicide at the Children's Hospital resulting in death row right away and was involved in the killing of 12 other numbers on last Tuesday.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A man walks into a bar and is slowly tearing his life apart. maybe because he is drinking poisonous acid instead of beer

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What does the black guy look for when he goes shopping? Some soap for his dead cat in the living room.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

two mormons missionaries knock on a door they are welcomed into the home and treated with kindness later the family is baptized. the mormons return home with a sense of accomplishment and purpose.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How do you leave a jackass in suspense? I'll tell you later.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Your mom is soo fat that when God said "let there be light" he had to ask her to move

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What was Joe's old name? Joe, I lied about the old part.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did Bob scream "Nurrrrrrrrr!!"?.....because he was mentally challenged.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A apple a day is good for your overall health and you should schedule check ups with your doctor to maintain good health and avoid seeing him everyday.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A cheerio gets a job at McDonalds and after working for a while, he gets employee of the month and goes to the district ball. While there, he meets a female(frosted) cheerio whom he asks out. She refuses because she only dates frosted cheerios. So, the male goes back to work for the next year, and his boss is happy with his work, so he asks him if he would like anything. The cheerio says yes, i want to be frosted. The boss says ok, i'll make you frosted, so now that he's frosted, he goes back to the ball. He asks the same female cheerio out, she says yes this time. He then asks her if she wants something to drink, she says yes. She wants some milk. So the guy stands in line for about 15 minutes, when he gets to the front, there is no more milk left. So he asks her if she would like some tea. she says yes. So he goes and stands in line for another 15 minutes only to find out there is no more tea. So then he asks her if she would like some punch, shesays yes. So after an hour of searching, he finds out there is no punchline......

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are Red Violets are blue I have short term memory loss Hey look thats my bike over there.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you say to a black man in the morning? Good morning

thumb_up thumb_down +7

There's an Irishman, a homo-sexual, and a Jew standing at a bar. What a fine example of an integrated community!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did peter griffin say to the black guy? Oh you are black.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do elves get for Christmas? Overtime.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops