What color is Michael Jackson? Pale because he's dead.

A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

Why did the virgin masturbate until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

What do you get when you cross a Chinese man with a dog? A happy Chinese man and a pile of dog bones.

A:You wanna here a good anti joke B:Yeah/sure A:Me too

Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

How many babies does it take to cover a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them.

What do you call a blackjack man driving a car? An average citizen.

A man walks into a bar. It was his push-up bar that he didn't install high enough. He bumps his head and it hurts.

fhfhfjjil;tyjgfkileg ryj ftrgndfhuiltyjgn

Who's Juan? DIS ONE

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

Why was the tree sad? Because a bird shat on it.

Imagine yourself in a box with no windows and no doors. How do you get out? Stop imagining.

Knock Knock! ... Whos there? ... Daisy ... Daisy who? ... Daisy me trolling... ;)

Why was the minority sad? Because the police beat him and then he was raped in jail.

What did the coat say to the dog? Nothing, the coat was inanimate

Tilt your screen back .

what did the robot say to the centipede? "Stop being a centipede!" It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

Roses are red Violets are blue I tryed to hang myself But my neck qad to fat

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...