How did the fat man die? He was fed porrage until he died. Who killed the fat man? Leonardo DaVici How did Leonardo Da Vinci die? Natural causes (Actually I have no idea how Leonardo Da Vici died but if I am wrong please correct me) Thank You for your coperation.

Q: Why do black people hate country music? A: Because every time they hear "hoe down" they think someone has shot their sister.

If Donald Trump was in Game Of Thrones, he'd probably be a part of The Wall.

You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

What is the funniest shirt Emil heskey has ever worn? A shirt that had this joke on it

What do you get when you run from Long Island to New Mexico? Tired.

How babies can you fit in a car seat? 1

what is sadder than lost in a ps4 game ? Your mom's funeral, she died in a horrible accident yesterday

Jack and Jill went up the hill To fetch a pail of water Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill called the paramedics

What did the little boy get after falling and hitting his face on the ground? A prolonged nosebleed. And Leukemia.

A guy walks into a psychiatrist's office covered only in Saran Wrap. He asks the doctor, "The strip of metal teeth is missing from the box, so could I borrow your scissors?"

Roses are red, violets are blue, if you didn't know that, go back to school.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at rhyming...... TITS

why did the person cross the road? to catch the chicken

Whats worse than getting broken into by a robber? Looking at Obama

Mum, "Why aren't you listening to me, are you deaf or something?" Son, (Silence)...

A black man walks up to a white man, and the black man says YO DIGGITY DAWG WASSAP FO DRIZZLE PLAYA BEEP BOBOTY BOP. And the white man stands there, confused as to what the black man said.

You must be Jamaican cause you have long dreadlocks and you are listening to Bob Marley

What did the guy say to helen keller nothing... according to helen keller

What did helen keller say when she saw a talking horse? nothing. because she didn't see the horse and they also cannot talk.

Two men walk into a bar The first man says to the bartender: 'Can I have a glass of H2O?' The second man says: 'Can I have a glass of H2O too?' The Bartender gives them both glasses of water because he is not irresponsible to serve hydrogen peroxide in his bar.

A bar walks into a man... The man begins screaming uncontrollably as the corner of the building is inserted into his anus. Brick by brick, the bar forces its way inside the man's ass, as blood begins dripping down his legs. The man knows damn well it is impossible for such a large building to be contained inside him, but he grits his teeth and forces his ass open wider. His ribs break, his lungs collapse, and his now lifeless body is stretched into the shape of the bar. The bar is almost entirely consumed before the man's skin gives way to the bulging pressure...with an explosion of blood & organs, the shredded remains of the man are slung-shot around the lot where the bar formerly stood. The bar, now soaked in a mixture of blood & organ fluid, reflects upon the failure of its experiment. For the next attempt, a man of far greater fortitude must be used, so that his body does not burst so easily. Only then will it achieve its dream of becoming the first bar to walk into a man.

E M I L Y L Y N C H B I L L I E J E A N L A R K I N YEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Kevin and Ramin

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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