What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

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whats big fat round and bounces on the ground? a ball and your mum

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What is the fastest bird in air? NONE WHO NEEDS TO RIDE BIRDS WHEN YOU HAVE AIROPLANES!!!!

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If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

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Why did the bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

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Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

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Knock Knock Who's there? re-posession officers

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Whats sadder than 20 dead babies nailed to a tree? The Parents...

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hola said the chinese man

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Knock knock. Who's there? Insurance. Insurance who? I'm sorry, sir; we can't fix your liver because you don't have any insurance.

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what do you do after throwing a water bottle in the trash? Hug a tree

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What's faster than a Nascar Racecar? My thoughts. -Juanita

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ... So he didn't get Mono from Janelle.

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roses are red violets are red i smell my wife nows shes dead

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A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

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So the man goes to the doctor and the doctor tells the man " you will have to quit masturbating " So the man asks " why" And the doctor said " so I can examine you "

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What haircut did Timmy get at the barbershop? He didn't, he saved money from the barber by going through chemo.

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What do you get when a sister and a brother have sex? A deformed child.

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What do you call a hamburger with nothing inside of it? A virgin.

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Q: Why did the mom try to wake up a sleeping bag? A: Because it's morning and her kid is curled up inside fast asleep

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How do you stop a dog from barking? Cut it's head off

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A polish guy Is sick of being made fun of for his ethnicity, so he decides that he is going to act Italian thinking that no one makes fun of Italians. He stays home for weeks to practice this and one day walks out, up to a store and says"eh, get me some lasagna and zucchini !" the man at the store asks if he's polish.

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Why was the black man running down the street with a suitcase? He was late for work.

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What's the best way to piss off a feminist? R@pe her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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