I took my blind grandmother to the art gallary

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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What color is the grass on Bob's lawn? Bob lives in a apartment.

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You having friends.

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If you have $5 and Chuck Norris has $5, Chuck Norris now has $10.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Lebron traveled

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teacher: what is your name? student: some people call me attractive (mx)

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What do you call a murderer who killed a black man. kkk

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A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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Why was the woman angry with Santa Claus? Because he kicked her hands.

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A black, jew, mexican, and american are on the boat. The boat begins to sink. As an idea, they all throw stuff off the boat to try to stay afloat. The black throws off cotton, the jew throws off yamakas, and the mexican throws off sombreros. Then, the american throws off the mexican because there are too many in his country. The mexican drowns. The boat still sinks and the american goes to hell while the other go to heaven.

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What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin sons? Nothing, his wife had an abortion.

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Faithful men.

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We're sorry, but something went wrong. We've been notified about this issue and we'll take a look at it shortly.

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Why is the interesting goat so talented at chess? He's Bobby Fischer's dad.

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What's louder than a cat stuck in a tree? A foghorn.

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why weren't all the jews wiped out in WW2 the gas bill was too expensive

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Me John Kasich! Me win Ohio primary!

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Sex with helen keller.

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Make a man a fire and he'll be warm for a day... set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

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A life-sized cardboard cut out of Justin Bieber was in a contest with a cut out of Liam Neeson. It was stiff competition.

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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?white vans

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What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

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I just started the seafood diet. It consists primarily of eating fish due to its high nutritional content.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops