Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama all found a magical lamp. The Genie appeared and said, "I will grant one wish for all of you, and one wish only." Bill wished to become president. The other two thought that would be pretty cool and did the same. (ic3)

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why did the man shave his balls cause they were unnecessarily hairy

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a black guy a mexican guy and a puerto rican guy are driving together in a car whos driving? Whoevers car it is.

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Who looks like Justin bieber, and is really cool? Justin Bieber, but I lied about him being cool.

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Snapple Fact #1 -slaves made life easier

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Q. What's yellow and looks like a duck? A. a baby duck

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What are astronauts called in Soviet Russia? Cosmonauts

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Q: whats white and smells like shit A: my ass

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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how did superman die? he got cought in a plane engine!

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Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

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A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

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-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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An Asian walks into a bar. He has a few drinks, but makes sure not to have to many. He then drives home safely, and enjoys a good nights rest.

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what did the man say to the other man he bumped into? sorry. and they never saw eachother again

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knock knock whos there micheal jackson too soon

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Why did the black man go to the back of the bus? The only unoccupied seats were back there.

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An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

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knock knock whos there? aids aids who? aids aids who? i dont go away

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Where did Little Johnny go when the bomb hit? Everywhere.

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What do you call the offspring of a gerbil and a hamster? Whatever you want.

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according to the ewspickle, it is Dumbledore's favorite food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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