What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

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What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

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Why wasn't the elephant allowed to the pajama party? Because he didnt have any pajamas.

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A house comes around the corner.

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What's invisible? A lot of stuff.

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Q: What did hitler say to his generals? a: In a circumstance as the one we have found ourselves in. Eliminating our most threatening of enemies would be very logical. Unless they were of the superior race therefore, it may be frowned apon by our low ranked comrades. Causing another assasionation attempt on myself. So in conclusion I believe eliminating a rich and intelligent race far more superior than our own, would be the best way to go. So collect the Jews of Warsaw and we might have a chance.

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Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

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Why did the mouse cross the road? Because he had been attached to the chicken with a nail gun.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your penis.

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Why did the girl make a sandwich for her boyfriend? Because she offered to make lunch in order to save money by not going to a restaurant.

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A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

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Why is Michael J. Fox so go at dance? Because he took lesson as a child

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what do you call a black man sleeping on a park bench at 2 in the morning? Homeless

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What's big and white and wilbkill you if it falls from a tree? My dick.

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What did the big Chimney say to the little Chimney? Nothing they are chimneys ....

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Knock Knock Jehovah's witnesses!

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What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

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Q: What did the nazi say to hitler? A: You like my Auschwitz?

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A man was struck by lightning. What did you think he got super powers or something? No. He died a horrible death

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Q: what's red and blue and covered in piss? A: everything. I'm so sorry.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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