What did the doctor say to his wife? We have grown apart over the years, I want a divorce.

what does the doctor do when he tells you you have aids? he laughs and says "hahahahahhaha sucks for you, i dont!"

Why are Asians yellow? Because that is their natural skin color

Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

what did the mexican do yesterday? bang your mom

Why did the black man get some Kool-Aid? Because he was thirsty, and thought Kool-Aid would be able to quench his thirst.

How do you take a picture of a man with a wooden leg? You can't take pictures with wooden legs.

Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the bird.

How many rats does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. But they have to be really small.

Why was the boy crying? Because he was told he would never find a wife

What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

What is green and is not grass A frogg

What did peter griffin say to the black guy? Oh you are black.

Out of Jill, Jason, Jesse, Jane and Harold, which one is the odd one out? Jason, because he only has one arm.

What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

Ask me if im a truck. Are you a truck? Yes.

Why is Keven's name spelled with an E Because his parents are black.

Before Marriage: Boy: Ah at last. I can hardly wait. Girl: Do you want me to leave? Boy: No don't even think about it. Girl: Do you love me? Boy: Of Course. Always have and always will. Girl: Have you ever cheated on me? Boy: Never. Why are you even asking? Girl: Will you kiss me? Boy: Every chance I get. Girl: Will you hit me? Boy: Hell no. Are you crazy? Girl: Can I trust you? Boy: Yes. Girl: Darling! After Marriage: (Read from bottom to top)

What happened when Johnny fell off of his bike? He suffered a very tragic and fatal brain hemorrhage resulting in a lower population by a minute percentile that is undetectable by the US Census.

What do a Siamese cat and a birch tree have in common? Both exist.

Q: what do you call a deer with no eyes A; roadkill

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She got shot in the head by her drunk step-dad.

How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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