If life throws you lemons, get under some shelter so you don't get pelted by flying fruit and worry about making lemonade later.

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A devout Islamic man walks into a weapons of mass destruction store he is shocked and appalled at how easily such dangerous weapons can be bought.

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Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

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Why did the washing machine laugh? Because it took the piss out of the knickers!!!!! :)

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Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

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Have you seen Stevie Wanders new house? No. Neither has he.

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Q How is it Going Patty? A:Hi Patrick hows it going?

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Doctor! Doctor! There's a fly in my soup! Gross.

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A horse walks into a bar You have been reading so many anti jokes that you can actually anticipate the anti-joke punchline to this joke, because it is one of maybe 3 or 4.

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Whats black and white and red all over?? Half a zebra

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Yo mama so fat when she dresses in red she looks like clifford the big red dog!

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In class a teacher said "Stand up if you think you'r stupid" A kid stands and the teacher ask why? The kid said: "Oh I thought it'd be a bit fair since your standing up.

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Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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What looks like mud, smells like mud and eats mud? An African

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes.

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Q: What was the pirate movie rated? A: PG-13 actually because, despite the potentially graphic nature of the previews, the creators scaled down mature content so that it could reach a wider audience.

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OMG I JUST FOUND THE GREATEST WEBSITE YOU SHOULD TOTALLY CHECK IT OUT OMG ITS http://anti-joke.com/submit

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Your mamas so fat that she went to the doctor and he said she has a very high case of diabetes so now she's trying to excerise more and watching what she eats.

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What's black, blue, red, green, white, purple, orange, yellow, etc.? Last I checked, a bunch of colors

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would you rather harry styles my dick have harry styles suck my dick or both of you style on my harry dick?

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What's the difference between an orange and a banana? they're spelled differently

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Why doesn't Austin have sex? Because when his wife gets hot he puts dirt on her and hits her with a shovel

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How did the Cuban get into Florida? Well he got his passport and other papers, flew in, then went to Customs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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