you go to cvs and theres a robber trying to shoot everyone and the cashier says do you have a rewards card

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? no... Well, It's really nice. :)

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John: what is blue and goes blub blub Phil; I don't know, what? John: a blue blub blub. What is green and goes blub blub Phil; a green blub blub John: no green blub blubs don't exist, what are you stupid?

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Why was the boy crying in public with no clothes on? Because he had no clothes on in public.

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Q: How did the man walk across the road? A: With his own 2 feet!

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What do you call a hamburger with nothing inside of it? A virgin.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Does this rag smell Like chloroform to you?

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have you ever tried Ethiopian food? neither have they

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roes are red violets are blue we have nothing in common so baby were through

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You know what makes me smile? Facial muscles.

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Why didn't the little asian kid go to his friends party? Because he wasnt invited.

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What did the worm say to the butterfly? Nothing, worms don't talk.

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how many black people can you fit in a car? However many sets there are.

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Why was the black man running down the street with a suitcase? He was late for work.

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WITH YOUR RED THUMBS COMBINED! I AM CAPTAIN MORAL! You: GOOOOO (AWAY) MORAL! CAPTAIN MORAL MAN, IS A HERO, GONNA TAKE GREEN THUMBS RIGHT BACK TO ZERO... Moral: Okay that is all I remember about the Captain Planet Theme song... GIVE ME RED THUMBS MUAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA! PS: Redhead, three months have passed (more or less) I wont call you because we agreed you would get of this fucking place, but I can visit you if you are a good little girl! And yeah I am calling you Red, Tifa just reminds me of Final Fantasy and your big bosoms so yeaaaaah get your little red haired cunt over here so we can chat yes?

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A bear and a rabbit both take a dump in the woods below an old oak tree. They look at each other, smile and nod their heads in acknowledgment of one another. The bear is first to let go of his rather large load and a loud THUMP is heard throughout the woods. Shortly after another and then another. The rabbit looks at the bear for a moment then turns closes his eyes and begins to strain. Finally the sound of what can only be described as a machine gun rattles through the wood. Looking impressed the bear looks over at the rabbit as it pops off its last few pellets. When the rabbit is finished the bear asks "Do you have a problem with the shit sticking to your fur?" The rabbit thinks for a moment then looks at the bear and says "Umm... No, not really." So the bear uses the rabbit to wipe his arse.

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Q: Did you know Hellen Kellers father was a skilled craftsman? A: Neiter did she.

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What do you call 1 black guy and 9 other white guys? Patrick Mills

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A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car, who's driving? Their father Micheal, he adopted both of them from a mentally handicapped orphanage when they were five.

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What do you get when you stab Al with a sword? At

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A man walks into a bar. and buys a drink.

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What's the best way to piss off a feminist? R@pe her.

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Why wasn't the white guy voted for president? He had down syndrome

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Why wasn't cacto at school that day. Because Silas gave him extreme butthole aids.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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