What do a purple cow and a red fire engine have in common? Both like eating pizza on Fridays, except for the red fire engine.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, there could be several reasons. The sight of another chicken, its wondering imagination, but because chickens cannot speak, therefore, can never know the true answer.

What do you call a man in front of three trains that have explosives tied to them and that are making amazingly loud noises? An idiot who obviously can't identify danger and probably had a childhood injury that cause his life to be ruined forever most likely cause by an evil uncle.

What did helen keller say when she saw a talking horse? nothing. because she didn't see the horse and they also cannot talk.

Two men walk into a bar The first man says to the bartender: 'Can I have a glass of H2O?' The second man says: 'Can I have a glass of H2O too?' The Bartender gives them both glasses of water because he is not irresponsible to serve hydrogen peroxide in his bar.

What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

yo mama is so old, so old that she was given senior citizen discount at the restaurant.

The awkward moment when you find your wife on the online dating site you are on.

Where do babies come from? You fathers penis.

You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

What do you get when you run from Long Island to New Mexico? Tired.

Q. What do you get when you mix eggs, mashed potatoes and salt? A. A pretty good batter for mashed potato pancakes.

What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

Q. Why was little Timmy crying? A. Because his sister died of cancer.

My friends and family all recommended me for alcoholics anonymous, but all i had to say is that my father didn't raise me to be quitter.

Q. There were 2 Mexicans in a car, who was driving it? A. The police officer.

Yo' mama's so black the dark couldn't even see her.

Q: pete and re-pete were on a boat, pete fell off. who was left? A: i dont know, but why did pete fall off in the first place, that dumb ass

I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one . Though , I do have cancer .

So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

Did you hear the joke about the vacuum? It sucks.

How babies can you fit in a car seat? 1

What did the homosexual farmer say when he answered the phone? Hello

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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