What did the fat man say to everyone? Hey everyone! I am i fat man!

Whats black and blue and red all over? A housewife that was recently abused by her alcoholic wife. (from will c. and jack f.)

You wanna hear what's totally out of this world? The moon

Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says 'Why the long face?' The horse says 'My alcoholism is destroying my family.'

Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A: Caner.

Brain fart

Roses are red, and many other colors too.

Q: What's worse than having a terrorist throw a fridge at you? A: World War 5

Wat did the man say to the other man when they were alone. We dont know. They were alone.

Why did the Grizzly bear refrain from attacking the hiker? It didn't. The hiker was torn to shreds within minutes.

What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

What did the monkey say to the newlywed couple? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

A pirate walks in to a bar. The bartender notices he has a steering wheel in the front of his pants, so he says to the pirate, "you know you've got a steering wheel in your pants, huh?" The pirate responds, "Arrrrrrrrr, it's for me carrrrr."

"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

Q. Why did the man walk away from his wife? A. Because he wanted to walk away from his wife.

A. why'd the chicken cross the road? B.a dog got hit by a bus.

Why was the man dress in a suit ? He had a job

Hey man, you the tall one! Yes? Do you understand me? No. But you do overstand me right? Yeah, I overstand most people.

What's worse than a dead baby? A dumpster full of dead babies What's worse than that? One is still alive at the bottom What's worse than that? It had to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It came back for seconds

Why couldn't the black man get out of jail? He couldn't post his bond.

How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

I man walks into a bar. He orders a drink, takes around 13.5 minutes to drink it, then walks out. It takes him 10.7 minutes to walk home, 2.8 minutes less than he spent in the bar. When he is home, he decides to have a bath. 7.8 minutes into bathing, a radio plugged into an outlet near his tub falls into the water with him and he is killed. 29 miles away a woman sneezes twice.

How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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