What do you call 50 jewish, homeless men peeing into a river? Pollution.

can you pass the soap?

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

How did little Jimmy survive the 5 story fall? He didn't

Why did the cow say moo? Cows can't say anything they actually make noises that humans interpreted as "moo"

What did the Coke can say to the Pepsi can? Nothing it is a inanimate object and cannot speak.

What do fat people and shinease people have in common? They both have a lot of chins.

a morman walks into a bar, he buys a 7up.

Whats fuzzy and pink? A pink fuzz ball

A guy walks into a bar, unfortunately for him, he walked in on a huge bar fight and managed to get the hell knocked out of him as he entered the door.

Why is the earth round? Because God saw it was flat and thought "too flat lets turn it around" And all was good.

There are 3 prisoners inside a cage. All the prisoners are blind folded and wearing hats. They are told there are 5 hats all together, 2 blue hats and 3 red hats. If one of them can answer what color hat they are wearing they are all set free. However, they have no idea what color hat they are wearing, only what color hat the other prisoners are wearing. They are also not allowed to tell what color the others are wearing. So the game begins: The first prisoner takes off his blind fold. The guard says "What color hat are you wearing?" and the first prisoner says "I don't know." The second prisoner takes off his blind fold. The guard says "What color hat are you wearing?" and the second prisoner says the same thing, "I don't know" Now the third prisoner didn't even need to take off his blind fold. He already knew the answer. He said, "Sir, I know I am wearing a red hat" The guard smiled and all the prisoners are set free. Why? If the first prisoner saw the other prisoners blue hats then he knows he's wearing a red hat because there are only 2 blue hats and 3 red hats. But he sees one guy wearing blue and one guy wearing red, so he says "I don't know." The second prisoner took off his blind fold and the same thoughts occur. If he saw the other prisoners wearing all 2 blue hats, then he knows he's wearing red. Instead, he sees one guy wearing a blue hat and the other guy wearing a red hat. So he says "I don't know" Now the third prisoner doesn't even need to take off his blind fold. Why? He heard the other prisoners saying they don't know, which led him to believe that all they saw was blue and red hats. That means if he takes of his blind fold he will see that both of the previous prisoners will be wearing blue hats and since there are only 2 blue hats available, he must be wearing a red hat.

Whats Brown and fluffy ASIAN TITS

What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

A Muslim walks into a Bar, He buys everyone a round of drinks and enjoys the rest of his night

Why did to plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

What is the difference between the sky and the ocean? They're both blue.

How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

Q: What's red and bad for your teeth? A: Bricks.

What do you call a guy with a rainbow tuxedo on? A classy man that is very well dressed

What do you get when you run from Long Island to New Mexico? Tired.

My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

Two men walk into a bar The first man says to the bartender: 'Can I have a glass of H2O?' The second man says: 'Can I have a glass of H2O too?' The Bartender gives them both glasses of water because he is not irresponsible to serve hydrogen peroxide in his bar.

Whats the difference between a black man and a bike? I don't enjoy riding bikes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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