A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are on the run from the police. They see a barn, and decide to hide inside it. They find three burlap sacks, and each hide in one. The police enter the barn, arrest each of the girls, and sentence them to life imprisonment for murder.

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Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

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Your momma's so obnoxious, your dad left.

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What time is it? 2:47 PM.

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There is a Asian a black guy and a white guy the black guy loves apples the white guy loves pears and the Asian loves Macaroni the white guy gets a apple the black guy gets a pear and the Asian has no lunch so the black guy kills the white guy for the apple and the Asian kills the black guy because he is hungry

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Why is the world going to end on 9 December 2014? I don't know why, but IT IS

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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i saw amango it splootered

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Your moms so fat she weighs 200 kilograms

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A man went to the doctor and told him he was having the strangest dream. "First I was a tee pee Then I was a wigwam A tee pee, a wigwam. Do you have any idea what could be wrong?" The doctor looked at the man and said "You have aids."

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A guy walked into a bar a hundred years ago and but a pint of whiskey. He is dead now.?

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What do you call 50 jewish, homeless men peeing into a river? Pollution.

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can you pass the soap?

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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I'm Coming

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What is the worst joke to tell a Orphan? Knock Knock Who's there Not your parents ( Man than slams door in little girls face)

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What did the Coke can say to the Pepsi can? Nothing it is a inanimate object and cannot speak.

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How did little Jimmy survive the 5 story fall? He didn't

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Why did the cow say moo? Cows can't say anything they actually make noises that humans interpreted as "moo"

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What do fat people and shinease people have in common? They both have a lot of chins.

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So a man walks into a bar with a monkey. I forgot the rest of this joke, but your mom is a whore.

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You know what's funny? You can't spell manslaughter without laughter.

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How many lesbians did Tiger Woods bang? None, his standards are much higher than that

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Why is the earth round? Because God saw it was flat and thought "too flat lets turn it around" And all was good.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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