What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

I? Everett

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun! So I KILL YOU!!!!

what is the name of the book that helen keller wrote LADIUFgSLDGFhalkjgfvcgh

a person who will soon die of beeties

What did Anne Frank say to the German Officer? Nothing. She had to keep quiet in a cramp attic in order to survive.

A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That's very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. The Black woman said, "Oh, den I uses the middle names."

A husband and a wife were having a conversation: Woman: Why is the baby on fire? Man: I dont know. Woman: BUY ME SHOES!!!!!!

A lesbian and a gay both lie about there gender on eharmony, trying to get a date with someone there own gender. By coincedene, they get matched and go on a date, and both of them realize how weird this situation is and go home.

two scientists line up a frog at a line and tell it to jump it jumps 4 feet they cut off one front leg and tell it to jump it jumps 4 feet they cut off the other front leg and tell it to jump it jumps 4 feet they cut off a rear leg and tell it to jump it jumps 2 feet they cut off its last leg and tell it to jump it doesn't move they tell it to jump again it doesn't move the scientists come to a conclusion: frogs with no legs...cant hear

Why did the man steal the little girl? He didn't. She was his daughter and they were driving home after picking up the groceries.

What song does the lady camel sing to seduce male camels - my humps my humps my humps my humps How did sergay the camel respond? -we dont know. He died a fatal death involving hippos in hula skirts, and flying guavas

What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

In soviet Russia...things are different

What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

Why doesnt Squidward wear pants? Because he likes to hang loose

Keith figured gasoline burns, doesn't it? He was wrong.

A gay man watches football.

A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

why Is the teen's sock crusty? he stepped in the glue that his little sister was using for her art project.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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