Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? (Because she was blind and deaf?) No, because she was a woman.

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Finn: Jake, why can your body do all of those magical things? Jake: What do you mean? Finn: Oh never mind. And they both proceeded to enjoy a delicious breakfast.

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what's the only thing worse than losing a pen before a test? getting raped by a pedifile. -teagan doherty-

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Woof.

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What do you call a black man? A normal human being

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Why did the girl lie to the priest? because she didn't want to tell him the truth

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What's worse than dieing? Not much.

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Yes 59 10 away from my faverite number....... 49

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"Why did Jim Jones put cyanide in the People's Temple Flavor Aid?" Because he understood that adding sugar would be bad for their teeth.

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what do you get when you mix peanut butter and jelly? a sweaty black guy

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kara is funny she loves her money so she buys a bunny for her honey

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I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more ibuprofen...

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Why did blonde cross the road? She needed to get to work.

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why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

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"Knock, Knock." "Who's There?" "Banana."

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Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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Q: What do you call a room full of black people? A: A Social Gathering.

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696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969 i like potatos 696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969

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Rap. Skate. Smoke.

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Why didn't the lawyer submit the car accident he endured to his local courthouse? He was dying of internal brain damage from the shards of glass lodged in his brain from flying through the windshield.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, take this medication, and call me if you have any symptoms of nausea or heartburn.

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Roses are red, You're a failed abortion, Happy Valentines Day. :D

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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