WITH YOUR RED THUMBS COMBINED! I AM CAPTAIN MORAL! You: GOOOOO (AWAY) MORAL! CAPTAIN MORAL MAN, IS A HERO, GONNA TAKE GREEN THUMBS RIGHT BACK TO ZERO... Moral: Okay that is all I remember about the Captain Planet Theme song... GIVE ME RED THUMBS MUAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA! PS: Redhead, three months have passed (more or less) I wont call you because we agreed you would get of this fucking place, but I can visit you if you are a good little girl! And yeah I am calling you Red, Tifa just reminds me of Final Fantasy and your big bosoms so yeaaaaah get your little red haired cunt over here so we can chat yes?

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What did michael say to sam? (pedo face) YEH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Man 1: Ask me if im a flower Man 2: "are you a flower?" Man 1: if i was a flower do you think i could talk? man 1 was wondering why man 2 was so uneducated

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why did the man break his arm? he didn't, someone else broke it for him

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have 2 legs

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epic win?

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What would you do for a klondike bar? Pay for it, eat it and then proceed on disposing the packaging of the klondike bar

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What's the difference between 10,000 dead babies and a Farari? I don't have a Farari in my garage.

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Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

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Grease is the word that you heard it's got groove it's got meaning

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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why did they plain crash? cause of gravity stupid

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Women's Rights

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Sam: This math homework is gay. Cory: You should pursue a romantic relationship with your gay math homework.

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What happened when the paraplegic man went into the bar? Nothing the man couldnt get into the bar because the bar has no wheelchair ramp.

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Why did Lindsay Lohan talk to her car? Because she's insane

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A young man walks into a bar. A complicated chain of events leads to him marrying the owner's second cousin's half-niece-in-law.

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I want some pudding. but I didn't have my meat. how can I have pudding?

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Well, its allright then, just tired that is all, leave it be, I mean what if your wife sees it? What will she think?

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-Your mom worked as a prostitute and died a virgin.

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Why did the boy chuck a fridge at the other boy? Because he broke his toy train.

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Why Are Parking Lines White? - So You Can See Them...

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do yo know what's funnier than getting on a hidden camera show? Nope! it's just chuck testa

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what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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