why did suzie fall of the swings? because she had no arms.

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The awkward moment when you are reading these jokes and either it's not funny or you don't get it...

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I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

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Why did the virgin masturbate until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

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Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

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What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

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A women was driving along in her brand new, swanky, red ferrari when she spotted a red light in the distance. She stopped steadily, following the rules of the road. All of a sudden a loud bang came from behind her where a young driver had hit her at 50 mph. They both come to an abrupt stop and exited their vehicles. The women says "Idiot, you just hit me!" The boys says "oh don't worry, I have insurance."

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Q: You know what never gets old? A: The kids in a school shooting

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(Knock, knock) A: Who's there? B: Orange A: That is impossible. Oranges are inanimate objects and, therefore, cannot speak.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

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Why did the police arrest the black man? He'd committed a crime, and was punished accordingly.

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When you aren't feeling well, you should see a doctor like this: https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS5u4lryU5PzmLUKCGEKZgDWMeQ_96VLEKFGu7Wvk-4M7UXHkOXBw

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because skeletons don't get invited to parties because they are the remains of something that is dead and that would be a very ood thing to have at a party.

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What's the relationship between a frog and a building? They have nothing to do with each other so stop trying to figure out this query.

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What do you call an armless, legless man hanging on a wall? Art.

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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Q: Why is asprin white? A: It works.

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Scrooge McDuck dives headfirst into his pool of gold coins... He breaks his neck from the impact of the landing and dies.

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Once opon a time there was a black America He name was Bob

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "Yeah, but you make a really great sandwich!"

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park in a safe and risk free process.

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What did the coat say to the dog? Nothing, the coat was inanimate

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what do you call afish and a cat? a catfish

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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