Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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A man walks into his cubicle and sits down. After a long day of work, he goes home and happens to die whilst eating dinner.

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What did the baby do when it crossed the rode? It didn't get across it got hit by a car.

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A blond, brunette, and a red head are stranded on an island. They find a genie, who tells them each one can have one wish. They all wish for the same thing, to be back home with their families.

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An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

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If John has 10 packs of beer and he drinks 8 packs,what is John left with? Morbid Obesity.

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Why is did the blonde cross the road? She was trying to catch the chicken.

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How does a cancer patient bathe? He can't because he lives in an arid climate where water is scarce.

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How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

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Q:Why is rugby one of the safest sports to play? A: It isn't , it is in fact very dangerous.

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roses are red violets are blue me + you =the perfect 2

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Roses are red Bacon is red Poems are hard Bacon

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curtis campbell has no ear lobes so he bought some milk and drank it with his cereal.

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How do you confuse an English Professor? Light your pants on fire and flop around like a fish.

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moonshine most none americans think its just when the moon shines we have another story

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Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings? A: Those that wear them think that said earrings positively accentuate their physical appearance.

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Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, if it weren't for the women our peckers would rust. By:Jhonny Thomas Spikes & Trenton Thomas Prather

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Q: Knock - Knock A: NO SOLICITORS!

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What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your mum is dead, Just fucking with you! Kelvin Yang.

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You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

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Boner

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

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How was the copper wire invented? 2 Jews pulling on the same penny!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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