Q: What's blue and fuzzy? A: Blue fuzz

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Roses are red Violets are blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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How did Bella fly? Very badly.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because skeletons cannot live on their own and there is no such thing as a skeleton that can walk across roads without muscles.

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Yo momma so fat, she's dead.

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No smoking No eating No drinking On this bus Didn't say anything about sniffing

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"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

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You know what makes me sick? Bacteria

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What did one door say to the other door? - Nothing, doors can't talk

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What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

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What did the nazi say to the jew? Nothing, he shot 'em

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because i was on the other side and we were going to catch a movie

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What is big, round, hairy, black with a little bit of white and red stripes, large feet, small hands, squinty eyes and a purple beret? Nothing. How ridiculous.

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Why do black guys have ashy elbows? Because of 9/11

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

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whats big fat round and bounces on the ground? a ball and your mum

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What did the girl say before she jumped a bridge? "Do you think I can jump off this bridge?"

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A horse walks into a bar. He politely holds the door for a young woman.

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why was the little girl crying? because i raped her.

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What is the fastest bird in air? NONE WHO NEEDS TO RIDE BIRDS WHEN YOU HAVE AIROPLANES!!!!

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What's more fun then spinning a dead baby around on a clothesline at 50 miles an hour? Stopping it with a shovel.

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what happens when chuck norris loses his hokey-bar? your mother

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops