Why can't basketball players play hockey? Because hockey and basketball season occur at the same time.

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what did the thief say to the man that lost his car? i stole your car.

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Katy perry isn't on clould nine because it's physicaly impossible to stand on water persipitation.

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Q: What do you call a fish with no eye? A: Fssshh

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What do you call a man with a spade on his head? Doug

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A jew is a human being who will understand and laugh at a joke, while a pizza will just sit there because it is only a delicious thing that people eat.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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What's 9+10? 19

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OSS ARE RED VIOLENTS IS BLUE U BELONG THE ZOO I WILL BE THERE TO BUT LAUGHIN AT U

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I just flew in from New Zealand, and boy am I tired. It was a really long flight and I found it incredibly difficult to sleep in those seats, so I didn't bother and kept myself awake watching in-flight films the whole way.

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. An impossible thing because he can't walk.

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What does a black person and ebola have in common? They both kill people

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Why did the clown fall off the unicycle? Because I shot him in the face.

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Why couldn't the Jew get pregnant? Because he was man.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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What's the sound of one hand clapping? The same as two hands; just not as loud.

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CJTheBEST Sticks and stones, May break my bones, Because i have osteoperosis

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Truth is Jordan Abu aita has a hairy @ss

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Q: Why didn't the bunny eat the carrot? A: The bunny didn't have any carrots. Poor bunny.

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What did the plane say to the world Trade Center on 9/11? Nothing a plane is an object therefore cannot talk.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your limbs scliced off with a chainsaw and being put in a cage to get mauled by a Mutant Man-eating horse.

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What did the frog say to the other frog Your a chode

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Why were there only 5,000 Mexicans at the Battle of Alamo? They only had 1250 trucks.

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why did the chicken cross the road to get to your house knock knock whos there the chicken

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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