Knock Knock Who's there? Jim Come on in!

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What do you call two spaniards talking in French. Bilingual.

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing... She had no arms. Knock knock, who's there... Not Sarah. Face Face, who's there... Probably Sarah.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was jewish and saw a nickel on the other side

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How do you get a drugged man, a giant sombrero, and a guitar into a Chuck-E-Cheese? You take multiple trips.

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What is the opposite of a joke ? Racism

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What's invisible? A lot of stuff.

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What's sad about a girl getting hit in the face with a shovel? The shovel got dented..

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So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

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what did Tim get for Valentimes day? nothing, no such day exists. spell check

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denisssssssssssssss

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A guy uses Google locations to find his friend Chuck Norris.

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Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

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Q:what do u call a dead baby tied to my feet? A:new shoes

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A man walks into a bar, orders a drink, drinks it, and leaves.

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Why'd the gay man get fired from the sperm bank? He was repeatedly late to work.

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Why did the pumpkin when orange is not a letter in Spanish? Because moon shoes are der milf

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It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Henry threw it well.

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"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

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Why did Timmy's face hurt? Because there was a frog stapled to it.

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What did the boy with cancer, no arms, and no legs get for his birthday? Nothing he was dead.

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What did the customer say to the waiter when he found a fly in his soup? Sorry to bother you on your break, but why didn't I get a fly in MY soup?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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