Whats slower than molasses? Slightly thicker molasses.

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

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True fact: every rabbit lives their whole cute life.

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Q.What did the homeless kid get from santa? A. Play Doe. Because he was a good boy. Q.what did the Rich Kid get form santa? A Coal. Because he was a bod boy. The rich kid then got mad and threw the coal at the homeless kid hitting him on the head which killed him of enturnaly bleeding.

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Do you know what kind of world I dream of? Until you tell me, no I don't. How could I? I'm not telepathic, after all.

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Next season on teen moms, Justin Bieber tells her story.

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Is your refrigerator running? No.

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This made my day: The Japanese verb "to drink" is "nomimasu". [L]

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Your mom is so fat she decided to get out of bed and exercise because she realized her health would become serious and wanted ot do something about it.

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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Bläeghen-Fassybìll-No?cheb!

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what's worse than stubbing your toe? 9/11

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How do you kill a blonde? Drench her in fluoroantimonic acid and watch her explode in a violent and gruesome death.

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Mexicans don't use lightbulbs because they can't afford them.

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Why couldn't the black man swim? He has no legs.

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"My father walked out on me." "Oh that's strange because I saw him yesterday and he had no legs."

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, As you can tell...a lot of blood has been spilt today.

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Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

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How do rocket scientists exchange greetings? They say "hi"

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven eight nine

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roses are red violets are blue if you and your sister were hanging from a cliff i'd save your sister

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But I don't use all those things myself Nero, I do however teach people how to use it.

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Why did the boy trip? A small explosion in the center of the earth caused by a hobo created a tsunami, causes a seagull to fly off in alarm. The seagull lands on a Smart Car, causing it to crash, which sends a signal off to a satellite in space. Because of this, a massive earthquake occurs. Oh, and the boy? There was a bowl of soup left carelessly on the ground.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops